I'll start it off....
Just like the original Grinch, my heart is also very very small.
Once I eliminate the EPA you'll literally be able to feel the pollution in the air. You'll be able to reach out and grab it, just like this.
As a big fat divisive douche bag, I've added less than this amount of civility to US politics. What can I say, I'm a greedy, cheating, self-serving, ass!
If your dick were this small, you'd be an angry idiot too!
See this? This represents the likelihood of me defeating Obama in 2012.