How to Speak British Without Making an Arse of Yourself
Here are some other wacky British slang terms:
* ?To knock you up? means to wake you up by knocking on the door.
* To "diddle" means to cheat someone.
* A "fag" is a cigarette.
* When the British are surprised or shocked they exclaim, "Blow me!"
* "Slap and tickle" means having sex.
* And courage is "a lotta bottle." From drinking alcohol from a bottle.
* And to them a real jerk is called a "wanker."
I can imagine a conversation at the front desk of a bed and breakfast in England:
CLERK: Tomorrow morning, would you like me to knock you up?
UNATTRACTIVE AMERICAN FEMALE GUEST: Are you serious?
CLERK: I wouldn?t diddle you!
UNATTRACTIVE AMERICAN FEMALE GUEST: Then how will you knock me up?
CLERK: Quite easily! And if I can?t do it, then I?ll get me mate to do it.
UNATTRACTIVE AMERICAN FEMALE GUEST: Oh? you?re one of those.
CLERK: One of those what? Oh, it?s me break. I?m going out to smoke a fag.
UNATTRACTIVE AMERICAN FEMALE GUEST: That?s disgusting!
CLERK: Oh, I know. Bad habit really. Ah, here?s Ben. He will take care of you.
BEN: So do you want me to knock you up in the morning?
UNATTRACTIVE AMERICAN FEMALE GUEST: You English men are so forward! So did you just come back from smoking a fag?
BEN: Certainly not! Bloody nasty, if you ask me. What time shall I knock you up?
UNATTRACTIVE AMERICAN FEMALE GUEST: What makes you think you can just have sex with me?
BEN: Blow me!!!
UNATTRACTIVE AMERICAN FEMALE GUEST: Oh, I don?t do that.
BEN: You want the old slap and tickle? There?ll be a whole lot more slappin? than ticklin?, that?s for sure! Sex with you? Whoa! That would take a whole lotta bottle!
UNATTRACTIVE AMERICAN FEMALE GUEST: So you?re well endowed?
CLERK: Oh, Ben?s a huuuuuge wanker!
BEN: This is just smashing.
UNATTRACTIVE AMERICAN FEMALE GUEST: It?d better not be just smashing. You?re gonna be my baby daddy!
BEN (rolling eyes): Bloody smashing!
UNATTRACTIVE AMERICAN FEMALE GUEST: Bloody? How big is your wanker?
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaawwww!!! HA HA HA!
story is taken from: http://www.hogwild.net/Rants/british-slang.htm
* ?To knock you up? means to wake you up by knocking on the door.
* To "diddle" means to cheat someone.
* A "fag" is a cigarette.
* When the British are surprised or shocked they exclaim, "Blow me!"
* "Slap and tickle" means having sex.
* And courage is "a lotta bottle." From drinking alcohol from a bottle.
* And to them a real jerk is called a "wanker."
I can imagine a conversation at the front desk of a bed and breakfast in England:
CLERK: Tomorrow morning, would you like me to knock you up?
UNATTRACTIVE AMERICAN FEMALE GUEST: Are you serious?
CLERK: I wouldn?t diddle you!
UNATTRACTIVE AMERICAN FEMALE GUEST: Then how will you knock me up?
CLERK: Quite easily! And if I can?t do it, then I?ll get me mate to do it.
UNATTRACTIVE AMERICAN FEMALE GUEST: Oh? you?re one of those.
CLERK: One of those what? Oh, it?s me break. I?m going out to smoke a fag.
UNATTRACTIVE AMERICAN FEMALE GUEST: That?s disgusting!
CLERK: Oh, I know. Bad habit really. Ah, here?s Ben. He will take care of you.
BEN: So do you want me to knock you up in the morning?
UNATTRACTIVE AMERICAN FEMALE GUEST: You English men are so forward! So did you just come back from smoking a fag?
BEN: Certainly not! Bloody nasty, if you ask me. What time shall I knock you up?
UNATTRACTIVE AMERICAN FEMALE GUEST: What makes you think you can just have sex with me?
BEN: Blow me!!!
UNATTRACTIVE AMERICAN FEMALE GUEST: Oh, I don?t do that.
BEN: You want the old slap and tickle? There?ll be a whole lot more slappin? than ticklin?, that?s for sure! Sex with you? Whoa! That would take a whole lotta bottle!
UNATTRACTIVE AMERICAN FEMALE GUEST: So you?re well endowed?
CLERK: Oh, Ben?s a huuuuuge wanker!
BEN: This is just smashing.
UNATTRACTIVE AMERICAN FEMALE GUEST: It?d better not be just smashing. You?re gonna be my baby daddy!
BEN (rolling eyes): Bloody smashing!
UNATTRACTIVE AMERICAN FEMALE GUEST: Bloody? How big is your wanker?
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaawwww!!! HA HA HA!
story is taken from: http://www.hogwild.net/Rants/british-slang.htm
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