Everyone Else has had more Sex than Me!

Everyone else has had more sex than me
Ohhh ohhh
Everyone else has had more sex than me
Ohhh ohhh

Everyone else has had more sex than me
Does anyone else get that feeling?
Teenagers, naked, couples in threes;
Grandparents swing from the ceiling;

Everyone else has had more sex than me
Ohhh ohhh
Everyone else has had more sex than me
Ohhh ohhh

Corporate capers and office amour;
Shenanigans outdoor and in
Resist, and then later you find out there's more
Regret in not doing the sin.

All loves have to die - of that there's no help;
My favourite way to end em'
Is the orb-weaver spider's, whose pedipalp
Enters the female pudendum,

Then dies on the spot, his corpse there still stuck,
Left for his rivals to curse it.
He would rather die than not get to fuck:
Personally, I reckon it's worth it

Everyone else has had more sex than me
Ohhh ohhh
Does everybody else get that feeling?
Ohhh ohhh
Everyone else has had more sex than me
Ohhh ohhh
Does everybody else get that feeling?
Whoa ohhhh ohhh ohh