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RogerV

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#1

Why do people get married what are the benefits?

10-23-2006, 06:30 PM

I understand it?s an oath under god etc. but why do people have to sign a contract with the state they get married in.

What are the pros and cons? Like Pros tax savings or cons if you divorce 50/50
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#2

10-23-2006, 06:33 PM

the primary benefit... is the illusion of security and permanence.
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#3

10-23-2006, 06:34 PM

Good question, I wouldn't be going through a divorce right now if I knew the answer though!
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#4

10-23-2006, 06:35 PM

kids
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#5

10-23-2006, 06:35 PM

there are some financial benefits...

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RogerV

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#6

10-23-2006, 06:36 PM

Do the Pros out weight the cons?

I just dont get why anyone would sign a contract giving away Half
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#7

10-23-2006, 06:36 PM

I got married once, i'll never do it again i can tell ya that.
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#8

10-23-2006, 06:37 PM

Re

Originally posted by mchtye

I got married once, i'll never do it again i can tell ya that.

That what scares me..to make a mistake and regret it after..But I want kids !

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#9

10-23-2006, 06:39 PM

Marriage is pointless, if you can't spend the rest of your life with someone without signing a contract that says you are gonna, then your relationship is bupkis anyway.
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#10

10-23-2006, 06:40 PM

Originally posted by LB-69

That what scares me..to make a mistake and regret it after..But I want kids !

Completely agreed, I want kids, I'd almost rather raise them myself if I could. After a failed marriage already and only being 23, I now see what most older guys mean when they say getting married is a mistake.
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#11

10-23-2006, 06:45 PM

sorry dont ask me im never getting married well maybe when im 80 an have hours to friggin live!!

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#12

10-23-2006, 06:45 PM

Originally posted by LB-69

That what scares me..to make a mistake and regret it after..But I want kids !

Oh, i forgot to mention, i got 2 kids = i never get to see them + $450 month
Dont get me wrong, i love my kids but the new cock she married makes like 80k a year ... plus she makes 30k at her job. They must still need my money for their car payments i guess.
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#13

10-23-2006, 06:49 PM

Why have the same cereal everyday when you can have coco puffs one day , count chocula the next , rice krispies the next day ?

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#14

10-23-2006, 06:51 PM

Why have the same cereal everyday when you can have coco puffs one day , count chocula the next , rice krispies the next day ?

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#15

10-23-2006, 06:53 PM

Originally posted by LB-69

That what scares me..to make a mistake and regret it after..But I want kids !

I'm going to get married and have the ceremony and do everything else except sign a legal State contract.
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#16

10-23-2006, 06:55 PM

Originally posted by Juicy D. Links

Why have the same cereal everyday when you can have coco puffs one day , count chocula the next , rice krispies the next day ?

heeheeh

Good point.
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#17

10-23-2006, 06:57 PM

it kind of simplifies things for you legally, especially if you have kids...plus there are some financial benefits

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#18

10-23-2006, 06:59 PM

I got married for the legal advantages and to show my husband how much I love him and how committed I am to our relationship. It was a wonderful day, just us two and our two good friends as witnesses. None of that princess bullshit, churce, huge cakes or hundreds of guests.

Besides the obvious advantages, there's an important bonus to those of us who are in a relationship with a "foreigner" - the partner gets a full recindency permit automatically after the marriage. If me and my English webmaster hubby weren't married, he would eventually have to get an offline job to be able to live with me. And even getting some minimum-wage-maximum-hours job would be difficult for him, since he doesn't speak Finnish. Yet

Plus I got to change my unbelievably long and difficult to pronounce last name to a nice, short English one

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#19

10-23-2006, 07:14 PM

People get married because they love each other and they want to have kids... Bad thing when you're married is when you face obligations..

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#20

10-23-2006, 07:15 PM

I see no benefits to getting or being married
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#21

10-23-2006, 07:17 PM

i can't see the thing behind marriage , maybe it because i'm not a religous person seeing as marriage is more of a religous thing
here in oz , if you live in a defacto relationship for longer then 18months ( i think its 18months) then under legal status you are a married couple
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#22

10-23-2006, 07:18 PM

So you have somebody to change your depends when you're old

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#23

10-23-2006, 07:19 PM

There are benefits...kids, citizenship...

Ok, ya, that's about it.
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#24

10-23-2006, 07:19 PM

Originally posted by mchtye

I got married once, i'll never do it again i can tell ya that.

Of course not, bigamy is illegal.

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#25

10-23-2006, 07:21 PM

There are no tax savings, it is worse to be married.

The 50% divroce number is a BS number, one that is often quoted. Basicly 50% came from the total amount of people being divorces in a year, compaired to those being married in same year. However since the pool of all people married is much larger then those getting married each year, getting to 50% is not tough to do.

I do beleive people get married to young many times, for the wrong reasons, or without thinking much - maybe even knowing they can easily bail out.

But what do I know, I am married.

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#26

10-23-2006, 07:23 PM

My soon to be "marriage" to my fiance is not the traditional type.
We will have a ceremony, a reception, and all that jazz. We just will not have a marriage license. In its place is a series of legally binding contracts that cover everything from health related issues, powers of attorney, personal property, and of course penalties for breaching the terms of the contract.
It is above board and more binding than a state sanctioned marriage. Just in the eyes of the state it is not considered a marriage.
When we have kids we will of course update the contracts to cover them as well. This portion could be overruled by the courts since children are involved but if it is a fair contract and the kids are not in danger a court would uphold it.

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#27

10-23-2006, 07:27 PM

Originally posted by mchtye

Oh, i forgot to mention, i got 2 kids = i never get to see them + $450 month
Dont get me wrong, i love my kids but the new cock she married makes like 80k a year ... plus she makes 30k at her job. They must still need my money for their car payments i guess.

That's not a by product of marriage though... Alimony is. I have a son and pay child support on him but waqs never married. At least all the money I send for him goes into a trust she setup for him.

Anyway the only reason I can see to get married is for some tax benefits and maybe cheaper car insurance. Otherwise it's just something that makes breaking up more painful and thus would arguably make people try a little harder to work things out. Seems not to work though. =[

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#28

10-23-2006, 07:28 PM

roger, is it possible that there an argument out there that would convince you to get married?

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#29

10-23-2006, 07:29 PM

Originally posted by After Shock Media

My soon to be "marriage" to my fiance is not the traditional type.
We will have a ceremony, a reception, and all that jazz. We just will not have a marriage license. In its place is a series of legally binding contracts that cover everything from health related issues, powers of attorney, personal property, and of course penalties for breaching the terms of the contract.
It is above board and more binding than a state sanctioned marriage. Just in the eyes of the state it is not considered a marriage.
When we have kids we will of course update the contracts to cover them as well. This portion could be overruled by the courts since children are involved but if it is a fair contract and the kids are not in danger a court would uphold it.

Gay and adopting?

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#30

10-23-2006, 07:32 PM

Originally posted by Mike AI

There are no tax savings, it is worse to be married.

The 50% divroce number is a BS number, one that is often quoted. Basicly 50% came from the total amount of people being divorces in a year, compaired to those being married in same year. However since the pool of all people married is much larger then those getting married each year, getting to 50% is not tough to do.

I do beleive people get married to young many times, for the wrong reasons, or without thinking much - maybe even knowing they can easily bail out.

But what do I know, I am married.

I personally think Its a Security Benefit for the ladies which is fine if they take care of their men.

I just dont understand why it has to be a Legal document if it wasnt I bet people would get married for the right reasons and not trap each other
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#31

10-23-2006, 07:36 PM

Originally posted by corvette

roger, is it possible that there an argument out there that would convince you to get married?

anything is possible I have a great Fiance' right now I just dont see the benefit of a Marriage cert. times have changed and its rare to have or be with someone forever.
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#32

10-23-2006, 07:38 PM

Originally posted by Mike AI

Gay and adopting?

Not gay but I do like what their lawyers have set up.
I have other reasons for not going the Government marriage route.

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#33

10-23-2006, 07:42 PM

Originally posted by RogerV

anything is possible I have a great Fiance' right now I just dont see the benefit of a Marriage cert. times have changed and its rare to have or be with someone forever.

let me ask you this

what if you found a girl that was very high quality and you liked her very much, and she gave you an ultimatum? Marriage or the relationship was over.

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#34

10-23-2006, 07:46 PM

it just felt right
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#35

10-23-2006, 07:48 PM

Originally posted by corvette

let me ask you this

what if you found a girl that was very high quality and you liked her very much, and she gave you an ultimatum? Marriage or the relationship was over.

if any chick gives a "ultimatum" to you as mentioned then the chick is not marriage material......

Fuck that....
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#36

10-23-2006, 07:52 PM

If there are no financial or legal benefits I don't see the need for it either.
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#37

10-23-2006, 07:54 PM

Originally posted by corvette

let me ask you this

what if you found a girl that was very high quality and you liked her very much, and she gave you an ultimatum? Marriage or the relationship was over.

it would be over i'm not worried about finding someone else. Just like any other type of deal wether it be business or marriage I'm not going to sign anything that gives someone power to riun my life. I have a great girl now who understands and doesnt pressure me.
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#38

10-23-2006, 07:54 PM

Originally posted by corvette

let me ask you this

what if you found a girl that was very high quality and you liked her very much, and she gave you an ultimatum? Marriage or the relationship was over.

it does seem like a tough position to be put in, but the question is why wouldn't you marry her? very high quality is hard to come by.
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#39

10-23-2006, 08:00 PM

Originally posted by MarkTiarra

That's not a by product of marriage though... Alimony is. [

Not so fast .......... the girl im living with now was married once for several years and she gets absolutely squat in Alimony.
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#40

10-23-2006, 08:03 PM

Originally posted by xebec

it does seem like a tough position to be put in, but the question is why wouldn't you marry her? very high quality is hard to come by.
give everything for love--rumi

lets say that it becomes difficult because you have invested a lot of time (5+) years into the relationship, then you come to a fork in the road and have to make a decision...

one path leads to freedom, alebeit with other things

the other path leads to a family, being grounded for the next 18+ years

huge decisions, i have seen people make poor/good decisions either way, in my opinion

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#41

10-23-2006, 08:06 PM

Marriage is for suckers.
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#42

10-23-2006, 08:06 PM

The only reason to ever get married is if you want kids.

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#43

10-23-2006, 08:14 PM

Originally posted by corvette

lets say that it becomes difficult because you have invested a lot of time (5+) years into the relationship, then you come to a fork in the road and have to make a decision...

one path leads to freedom, alebeit with other things

the other path leads to a family, being grounded for the next 18+ years

huge decisions, i have seen people make poor/good decisions either way, in my opinion

sometimes you just have to take a chance. you just have to take that leap of faith. trust and love. and its good to be grounded. especially in this world. family is important. they are who you can count on the most-- imo. but i guess it just comes down to what you want from this life. and what you are willing to give.
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#44

10-23-2006, 08:20 PM

Originally posted by corvette

lets say that it becomes difficult because you have invested a lot of time (5+) years into the relationship, then you come to a fork in the road and have to make a decision...

one path leads to freedom, alebeit with other things

the other path leads to a family, being grounded for the next 18+ years

huge decisions, i have seen people make poor/good decisions either way, in my opinion

sometimes you just have to take that leap of faith. trust and love. believe that you are making the best decision.
imo its good to be grounded especially with all that goes on in this world. family is important. they are the ones you can count on the most.

it just comes down to what you want out of this life and what you are willing to give.
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#45

10-23-2006, 08:28 PM

Originally posted by BradShaw

The only reason to ever get married is if you want kids.

what if she leaves you for another man. and your kids live with another guy while you pay child support.. thats what i have to deal with and it sucks balls.
I kinda got licky becasue she married a super rich trust fund kid. so my daugther flys in private jets etc. but I only get to see ger once a month for a couple days.

I'd rather pay a women to have my child then let me raise them. I want to know what the deal is before i sign anything. women change when they know they got you by the balls
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#46

10-23-2006, 08:34 PM

It provides a layer of security for the significant other.
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#47

10-23-2006, 08:39 PM

I'm still trying to figure that one out myself, and I am married. I have kids with her" so for those that are going to say why not leave anyway or anything to that nature." having kids makes the situation harder for a break up oro divorce. Not to say that it couldn't be done. We currently aren't arguing everything for the most part is great, but what I can say is that if I ever do get divorced I won't get married again.

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#48

10-23-2006, 08:42 PM

marriage is like religion, a crutch for the weak.

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#49

10-23-2006, 08:46 PM

Originally posted by mchtye

Oh, i forgot to mention, i got 2 kids = i never get to see them + $450 month
Dont get me wrong, i love my kids but the new cock she married makes like 80k a year ... plus she makes 30k at her job. They must still need my money for their car payments i guess.

Ouch, that would suck if that happened to me :-/

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#50

10-23-2006, 08:49 PM

Chris Rock -- married and bored, single and lonely...

Look at it like this -- renting a house, leasing a car? Paying your mortgage, buying a car in cash?

It's about options, why in the world you would think it means being tied to something is crazy. Hell for you Roger, Amanda might take off as a photog and you might be the one getting alimony ;)
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