I need a designer!

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  • Amputate Your Head
    There can be only one
    • Aug 2001
    • 39075
    #1

    I need a designer!

    I have heard some fucking wild shit before... but the requests for designers lately are by far some of the most humorous lines I've ever encountered. Just a few off the top of my head here... (in no specific order)

    1. Can you make some banners for me?

    2. Are you cheap?

    3. I can trade 10 hits a week for some banners...

    4. Send me an email but only if you're good...

    5. I only want the best and cheapest guys that really know what they're doing.

    6. Must be serious.

    7. Must know everything under the sun, including stuff I will never even understand, let alone use.

    8. How much for 3 bullets & one horizontal rule?

    9. Can you have it done by tonight?

    10. Wow.... these other guys said they would do a whole site for $50 bucks... I don't know... you seem kind of expensive.

    11. Can I pay you $10 a month until it's paid off? But I'll need a couple months grace period to get started.

    12. Are you cheap?

    and on..... and on..... and on....

    SIG TOO BIG
    Tags: None
    • Squishy
      Confirmed User
      • Aug 2001
      • 1809
      #2
      You outta run the ol' volvo pick-up truck right up the Hershey Highway with a box of Velveeta and a can of squeezy cheese, there, lil buddy! And bring me back something from the Taco Barn...like a slutty counter girl. Then we can talk all the design ya wanna, Nipples! Got Crabs? If not, I can turn you on to a guy I know...


      And you thought you were the only one with an drinking problem.

        Comment

        • Amputate Your Head
          There can be only one
          • Aug 2001
          • 39075
          #3
          I definitely want some o' dat smoke!
          SIG TOO BIG

            Comment

            • Squishy
              Confirmed User
              • Aug 2001
              • 1809
              #4
              Yes you do...good shit that looks like I rolled the buds in sugar...mmm.

                Comment

                • Roberto
                  Confirmed User
                  • Oct 2001
                  • 1459
                  #5
                  it's not so bad until you try to whore yourself at elance, geesh
                  i'm a legend in my spare time.

                    Comment

                    • Amputate Your Head
                      There can be only one
                      • Aug 2001
                      • 39075
                      #6
                      Originally posted by Roberto:
                      it's not so bad until you try to whore yourself at elance, geesh
                      I was whorin' myself at guru not too long ago... (I'm so ashamed...)

                      SIG TOO BIG

                        Comment

                        • ldinternet
                          Confirmed User
                          • Apr 2001
                          • 8245
                          #7
                          Lol...
                          I kind of get the feeling that this thread is somehow related to a post made a few hours ago
                          http://bbs.gofuckyourself.net/board/...ML/013620.html

                          Hehehe!

                          ------------------
                          Helmy Cash: Converting 1:135 on TGP traffic )

                          <font color="#606060">

                          [This message has been edited by ldinternet (edited 12-05-2001).]

                            Comment

                            • bhutocracy
                              Not making A Comeback
                              • Dec 2001
                              • 10218
                              #8
                              i don't mind trading content for banner design.. and helping out a little in return for traffic... but yeah some peeps will try anything to get something for nothing.. been burnt a few times early on designing front and tours in return for %'s of subscriptions... cause even tho you might have done an ok job on the design.. the bastard doesn't do anything to promote it or bother really optimising traffic for one reason or another (pet projects or other commitments) and you end up having to assume the role of marketeer to try and recoup costs..... you really have to vet the people out if you want to enter those sort of deals - make sure they know as much about running a site as you do designing one.. and of course never do anything without a contract (and make sure you get a percentage on the sale of the site as well if that eventuates)...

                              you get what you pay for.. if someone's charging $50 for a website, don't whinge about my costs.. go for it and come back to me later on when you aren't converting

                                Comment

                                • Amputate Your Head
                                  There can be only one
                                  • Aug 2001
                                  • 39075
                                  #9
                                  Originally posted by ldinternet:
                                  Lol...
                                  I kind of get the feeling that this thread is somehow related to a post made a few hours ago

                                  Hehehe!
                                  Correctamundo!

                                  I was gonna put it in as a reply... but then thought... nah... wouldn't want anyone thinkin' they were singled out or anything.

                                  SIG TOO BIG

                                    Comment

                                    • ldinternet
                                      Confirmed User
                                      • Apr 2001
                                      • 8245
                                      #10
                                      Not to boast, but I'm one smart motherfucker.

                                      Hehehe.

                                        Comment

                                        • boneprone
                                          Hall Of Fame
                                          • Jan 2001
                                          • 34415
                                          #11
                                          Amp is The Man!

                                          He's the only person around here that entertains me more than I entertain myself.


                                          BP4L

                                          Industry Hall Of Fame Legend Mike Jones
                                          Bow to the Power - Still BP4L
                                          http://gfyawards.com/hall-of-fame
                                          Learn about it kids.

                                            Comment

                                            • Amputate Your Head
                                              There can be only one
                                              • Aug 2001
                                              • 39075
                                              #12
                                              Originally posted by boneprone:
                                              He's the only person around here that entertains me more than I entertain myself.
                                              I'm glad to be of some use other than formatting these floppys all day.

                                              SIG TOO BIG

                                                Comment

                                                • Rocky
                                                  Confirmed User
                                                  • Jul 2001
                                                  • 3022
                                                  #13
                                                  my design work is priceless

                                                  but i'll settle for an ol' leakin' waterjug
                                                  Are you down with Sin?

                                                    Comment

                                                    • AWC
                                                      Confirmed User
                                                      • Aug 2001
                                                      • 1223
                                                      #14
                                                      it's really bad when you have to format floppies instead of C

                                                        Comment

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