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Single mom here too. My boys were 12 and 9 when my got lucky with PersianKitty.com We'd lived paycheck to paycheck for the most part prior to that.
Spoil them? Hell yeah.. teach them what hard work, dedication and respect can do... definitely. I'm sure I could have/should have done some things differently, but they've both turned out great (24 and 21 now). They both had to do decent in school.. follow my rules at home...do schoolwork and chores before play or tv, etc. Many things they wanted down the road they had to 'earn' by grades or by special chores.
PK
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