Originally Posted by shwsrvcs

Thanks for this message. One of things I am dealing with right now is my son not wanting to walk across the street to go see his mom. He and I have talked and he knows that his mother and I are not getting back together. She is humbled by what has happened to her but I'm not the person to beat her down further for my own benefit. I want my son's mother to be the pillar of stability that a mother should be. She doesn't want to be living next door to me, I don't want her to do that either. She wants to stand on her own two feet. It's tough I'm sure for a person to be twice divorced. She has no other children besides my son, so in many respects, I may be her last line of sanity and I would not like to be the person to push her over the edge of the cliff towards madness. I'd rather be a touchstone for her to be able to grab hold of and swing back up to better things. I know that for her, I don't have any responsibility, however, for our son, the responsibility is the most important thing that is. My son's mother will always be his mother and I will always be his father. It is what I show my son in this time that will ultimately be the legacy that I leave him.

I don't want to be the asshole that treated "that woman" badly and left her out there for the vultures.

I want to be the guy that was able to teach my offspring to take care of what is important (family) with no regard to spite nor retribution.

I have to think for more than myself in this situation. I have to think about how what I decide will lead my son in his future.

Tough...

DG