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THE BLONDE'S REVENGE!
* Why are brunettes so proud of their hair?
It matches their mustache.
* What's black, blue, and brown and lying in a ditch?
A brunette who's told too many blonde jokes.
* What's the real reason a brunette keeps her figure?
No one else wants it! * What do brunettes miss most about a great party?
The invitation.
* Why are so many blonde jokes one-liners?
So brunettes can remember them.
* What do you call a brunette in a room full of blondes?
Invisible.
* What's a brunette's mating call?
"Has the blonde left yet?"
* What do you call a good looking man with a brunette?
A hostage
* Who makes bras for brunettes?
Fisher-Price
HARD DRINKERS
A Texan walks into a pub in Ireland and clears his voice to the crowd of drinkers. He says, "I hear you Irish are a bunch of hard drinkers. I'll give $500 American dollars to anybody in here who can drink 10 pints of Guinness back-to-back." The room is quiet and no one takes up the Texan's offer. One man even leaves. Thirty minutes later the same gentleman who left shows back up and taps the Texan on the shoulder. "Is your bet still good?", asks the Irishman. The Texan says yes and asks the bartender to line up 10 pints of Guinness. Immediately the Irishman tears into all 10 of the pint glasses drinking them all back-to-back. The other pub patrons cheer as the Texan sits in amazement. The Texan gives the Irishman the $500 and says,
"If ya don't mind me askin', where did you go for that 30 minutes you were gone?". The Irishman replies, "Oh...I had to go to the pub down the street to see if I could do it first".
TWO COMPLAINTS
A man was carrying two babies, one in each arm, while waiting for a train. Along came this woman, seeing the two cute babies, started asking the man, "Aren't they cute, what are their names?" The man gave the lady an angry look and replied, "I don't know." The lady asked again, "Which is the boy and which is the girl?" The man looking angrier than before replied, "I don't know." The woman then started to scold the man, "What kind of a father are you?" The man replied, "I am not their father, I am just a condom salesman and these are two complaints that I am taking back to my company."
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