I once stuck a clairenet up my ass at a camp and actually got that thing to toot. This was back in High School. True story.
This was about the same time we were playing with blue flame farts, Bic lighters and Everclear shots. Stupid? Yes. Do I regret it? Hells no!
Mind you a woodwind uses a reed, so in ormal play you have to hold your lips and mouth in the exact right position to even get a sound or a squeak out of it. I sounded like Beethoven (I know he didn't play the clairenet, but I can not think of any musically inclined clairenet [layers at the moment and way to bumped out to Google).
