People often ask for a simple explanation of "Marketing." Well, here it is

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  • Juicy D. Links
    So Fucking Banned
    • Apr 2001
    • 122992

    #1

    People often ask for a simple explanation of "Marketing." Well, here it is

    1. You're a woman and you see a handsome guy at a party. You go up to him and say, "I'm fantastic in bed."

    That's Direct Marketing.



    2. You're at a party with a bunch of friends and see a handsome guy. One of your friends goes up to him and, pointing at you, says, "She's fantastic in bed."

    That's Advertising.



    3. You see a handsome guy at a party. You go up to him and get his telephone number. The next day you call and say, "Hi, I'm fantastic in bed."

    That's Telemarketing.



    4. You see a guy at a party; you straighten your dress. You walk up to him and pour him a drink. You say, "May I?" and reach up to straighten his tie, brushing your breast lightly against his arm, and then say, "By the way, I'm fantastic in bed."

    That's Public Relations.



    5. You're at a party and see a handsome guy. He walks up to you and says, "I hear you're fantastic in bed."

    That's Brand Recognition.



    6. You're at a party and see a handsome guy. He fancies you, but you talk him into going home with your friend.

    That's a Sales Rep.



    7. Your friend can't satisfy him so he calls you.

    That's Tech Support.



    8. You're on your way to a party when you realize that there could be handsome men in all these houses you're passing., so you climb onto the roof of one situated towards the center and shout at the top of your lungs, "I'm fantastic in bed!"

    That's Junk Mail.



    9. You are at a party, this well-built man walks up to you and grabs your ass.

    That's the Governor of California.



    10. You like it, but twenty years later your attorney decides you were offended.

    That's America.
  • CyberHustler
    Masterbaiter
    • Feb 2006
    • 28753

    #2
    good shit...
    “If you can convince the lowest white man he’s better than the best colored man, he won’t notice you’re picking his pocket. Hell, give him somebody to look down on, and he’ll empty his pockets for you.”

    Comment

    • StuartD
      Sofa King Band
      • Jul 2002
      • 29903

      #3
      Sounds pretty accurate to me. They should teach that in Universities
      This is me on facebook
      This is me on twitter

      Comment

      • Silly Guy
        Confirmed User
        • Jan 2007
        • 1421

        #4
        Originally posted by StuartD
        Sounds pretty accurate to me. They should teach that in Universities

        would make uni much more fun

        Comment

        • marko13
          Confirmed User
          • Apr 2004
          • 7512

          #5
          good one juicy....
          We are responsible for your hosting ... Enjoy in your life.
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          • Big_Red
            Confirmed User
            • Jun 2006
            • 4147

            #6
            haha good stuff.
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            • avalanche
              Confirmed User
              • Feb 2005
              • 1922

              #7
              Very good and actually accurate!
              Avalanche

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              Comment

              • AK
                MadZuma
                • Nov 2003
                • 6436

                #8
                hahahaha... very nice..... i like...
                Alfonsus Kusuma (AK)
                ak at madzuma.com
                skype me - alfonsus.com

                Comment

                • WZRogeR
                  My Sig was too Big! :(
                  • Feb 2006
                  • 1126

                  #9
                  heh) good post)

                  Comment

                  • Honez
                    Confirmed Brat
                    • Apr 2003
                    • 6636

                    #10
                    Brilliant!
                    Your Paysite Partner
                    Hone at YourPaysitePartner dot Com
                    Skype - Stressmonkey

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                    • OMG Jim
                      Confirmed User
                      • Oct 2005
                      • 3153

                      #11
                      Words of experience from the master!
                      ICQ: 254 914 537 - Skype: AlmightyJim

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                      • mikeyddddd
                        Viva la vulva!
                        • Mar 2003
                        • 16557

                        #12


                        I've seen a few of those. But, not all of em.

                        Comment

                        • woj
                          <&(©¿©)&>
                          • Jul 2002
                          • 47880

                          #13
                          pretty good
                          Custom Software Development, email: woj#at#wojfun#.#com to discuss details or skype: wojl2000 or gchat: wojfun or telegram: wojl2000
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                          • gimo33
                            Confirmed User
                            • Mar 2006
                            • 5599

                            #14
                            very nice...
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                            • MsWild
                              Confirmed User
                              • Apr 2006
                              • 2803

                              #15
                              haha great stuff
                              Always the biggest checks:

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                              • E$_manager
                                Too lazy to set a custom title
                                • Apr 2006
                                • 13557

                                #16
                                Great! thank you.
                                Enjoy more sales with EnjoyBucks!
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                                • aico
                                  Moo Moo Cow
                                  • Mar 2004
                                  • 14748

                                  #17
                                  You're at a party, you see a handsome guy, you go home and fuck him, the next day it hurts when he pees.

                                  That's Viral.

                                  Comment

                                  • DamageX
                                    Marketing & Strategy
                                    • Jun 2001
                                    • 14293

                                    #18
                                    Originally posted by StuartD
                                    Sounds pretty accurate to me. They should teach that in Universities
                                    They do. Well, except for the latter points.
                                    Whitehat is for chumps

                                    If you don't do it, somebody else will - true story!

                                    Comment

                                    • markz08
                                      Confirmed User
                                      • Jan 2007
                                      • 735

                                      #19
                                      hahaha, nice explanation...
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                                      • Nicky
                                        Too lazy to set a custom title
                                        • Mar 2003
                                        • 30071

                                        #20
                                        Hehehe good one, I liked the one about Arnold

                                        gfynicky @ gmail.com

                                        Comment

                                        • AsianDivaGirlsWebDude
                                          Purveyor, Fine Asian Porn
                                          • Jul 2004
                                          • 38323

                                          #21
                                          Originally posted by aico
                                          You're at a party, you see a handsome guy, you go home and fuck him, the next day it hurts when he pees.

                                          That's Viral.


                                          Okay, a few more...

                                          Two beggars were sitting side by side on a street in Rome. Each had an upturned hat. One had a cross in front of him, while the other had a Star of David.

                                          Many people passed by and looked at both beggars, but only put money into the hat of the beggar sitting behind the cross. A priest came by, stopped and watched throngs of people giving money to the beggar behind the cross, but none giving to the beggar behind the Star of David.

                                          Finally, the priest went over to the beggar behind the Star of David and said, "My poor fellow, don't you understand? This is a Catholic country. People aren't going to give you money if you sit there with a Star of David in front of you, especially when you're sitting beside a beggar who has a cross. In fact, they would probably deliberately give money to him just out of spite."

                                          The beggar behind the Star of David sat and listened to the priest, before turning to the beggar with the cross and saying, "Moishe, look who's trying to teach the Goldstein Brothers about marketing."

                                          -----

                                          An interoffice softball game was held every year between the marketing department and support staff of one company.The day of the game, as hard as the marketers tried the support staff beat the marketing department soundly.

                                          In their best tradition the Marketing Department decided to find their best 'spin' they could on the dismal result.They showed how they earned their keep by posting this memo on the bulletin board after the game:

                                          "The Marketing Department is pleased to announce that for the recently-completed softball season, we came in second place, having lost but one game all year.The Support Department however had a rather dismal season, as they won only one game all season."

                                          -----

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                                          • Juicy D. Links
                                            So Fucking Banned
                                            • Apr 2001
                                            • 122992

                                            #22
                                            i like this posttttttttttttttt

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