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Derek_M

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#1

Win a MrSkin.com Jersey by being funny...

08-18-2005, 08:06 AM

I was speaking with an affiliate about Epassporte the other day and they asked me, "Why should a MrSkinCash.com affiliate use Epassporte instead of checks?" So I explained that a lot of affilaites have had problems with getting US Postal Service mail delivered to them, especially if they are abroad in Europe or if they are in a not-so-populated area of the world. This got me to thinking about some funny rules, inspired by Jeff Foxwothy's "You might be a Redneck if..."

So I would like to start off the list of reasons of "As an affiliate of MrSkinCash.com you should use Epassporte if...."

I will be giving out a MrSkin.com Jersey (which you constantly see me wearing at the shows) to the funniest response on GFY that finishes the statement. I have started it off below:

"As an affiliate of MrSkinCash.com you should use Epassporte if..."

1. The mailman in your country does not wear shoes while delivering the mail.
2. The country you live in ends with the letters "stan".
3. The country you live in has a silent ?J?, ?K?, ?P? or any symbol over a letter besides a dot.
4. Where you live the letters UPS only mean the opposite of ?DOWNS? to you.

Please come up with your own and post away.

Derek Meklir
Chief Operating Officer
HUSTLER / LFP Inc. / Flynt Management Group LLC
ICQ: 284137502
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JFK

FUBAR the ORIGINATOR

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#2

08-18-2005, 08:12 AM

Mr Skin Jerseys ROCK

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For promo opps contact jfk at fubarwebmasters dot com
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BradM

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#3

08-18-2005, 08:15 AM

As an affiliate of MrSkinCash.com you should use Epassporte if... you lent your mom your credit so she could get that breast surgery she always wanted. But she ended up with a dried out vagina and unable to prostitute anymore, thus unable to pay back the loan. Your credit is screwed, and you can no longer get a credit card, or a bank account as the FBI and IRS is watching you.
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psili

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#4

08-18-2005, 08:15 AM

The country you're from is next in line to be invaded / bombed / sanctioned by good old George W. Bush.
The primary mode of transportation in your country is a camel.
The country you're from doesn't have a Starbucks.

Your post count means nothing.
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volante

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#5

08-18-2005, 08:17 AM

... the phrase "going postal" describes events on a good day.
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#6

08-18-2005, 08:18 AM

my postman keeps getting blown up by landmines... or kidnapped by radicals

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#7

08-18-2005, 08:19 AM

The banks in your country charge you more to cash your check than your checks are usually for.

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SleazyDream

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#8

08-18-2005, 08:21 AM

i love my mr skin shirt - it totally rocks

This dog, is dog, a dog, good dog, way dog, to dog, keep dog, an dog, idiot dog, busy dog, for dog, 20 dog, seconds dog!

Now read without the word dog.
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Rinaldo

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#9

08-18-2005, 08:22 AM

You should use Epassporte when you're mother is a dirty homo and used to dyke out in your sandbox when you were making sandcastles 3 feet away. Not that this is any reason to use epassporte but I figured it was a nice opportunity to let some deep emotional problems out and really get back to work.
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#10

08-18-2005, 08:23 AM

your country's banks have been usurped by drug lords

I can resist everything except temptation
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tASSy

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#11

08-18-2005, 08:23 AM

derek: i think you should just gimme one. i like those baby blue tee's with the heads on them too, remind me to take a picture for you - the kids who work at the local drug store seem to dig it, must be something about the nipples in the middle of each guy's face

tassy*PINK
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Nader

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#12

08-18-2005, 08:24 AM

nice i want one..those are badass jersey's!

Mr. Skin ROCKS............
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#13

08-18-2005, 08:25 AM

As an affilaite of Mr. skin you shoudl use Epassport because youll get your money even if the mailman is sleeping with your wife.
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Phoenix

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#14

08-18-2005, 08:25 AM

im going to get shot down at least 20 times tonight

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RevStats

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#15

08-18-2005, 08:25 AM

As an affiliate of MrSkinCash.com you should use Epassporte if your neighbor is a bushman and it isn't describing his hair preference.
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#16

08-18-2005, 08:26 AM

As an affiliate of MrSkinCash.com you should use Epassporte if...

Your mail service talks of Pony Express as a visionary and futuristic thing.
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#17

08-18-2005, 08:26 AM

As an affiliate of MrSkinCash.com you should use Epassporte if Mikeal Gorbachov is your neighbor
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brand0n

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#18

08-18-2005, 08:27 AM

when you go to check your mail and you have to have someone "cover" you

want to buy this spot for cheap? it is of course for sale. long term deals are always the best bet. brand0n/ at/ a o l dot commies.
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RockDaddy

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#19

08-18-2005, 08:28 AM

As an affiliate of MrSkinCash.com you should use Epassporte if your mail man carries an ak47.
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RockDaddy

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#20

08-18-2005, 08:29 AM

As an affiliate of MrSkinCash.com you should use Epassporte if bush will not rule out force as a possible resolution to your countries problems.
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FilthyRob

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#21

08-18-2005, 08:29 AM

You should really take Epassporte over checks if your picture is up at the bank and when you come in to cash them, the guard is instructed to shoot on site.

AKA - Clubsexy
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Frank The Tank

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#22

08-18-2005, 08:30 AM

As an affiliate of MrSkinCash.com you should use Epassporte if.. your mailman is kevin costner and hes not delivered in a while

aim : titanceltic icq : 307499327 Frank[@]babesandstuff.com
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Frank The Tank

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#23

08-18-2005, 08:31 AM

As an affiliate of MrSkinCash.com you should use Epassporte if your Mailman is a SheMailman and shouts YOU GOT MALE ! anytime she/ he delivers your mail

aim : titanceltic icq : 307499327 Frank[@]babesandstuff.com
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#24

08-18-2005, 08:32 AM

As an affiliate of MrSkinCash.com you should use Epassporte because its better than getting up from your chair to get the mail.
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#25

08-18-2005, 08:32 AM

As an affiliate of MrSkinCash.com you should use Epassporte if your Mailman is slower than Dial-Up

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RockDaddy

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#26

08-18-2005, 08:34 AM

As an affiliate of MrSkinCash.com you should use Epassporte if you can buy a pair of shoes, , shop for groceries, get a haircut and grab a burger at the same place you bank.
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khs

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#27

08-18-2005, 08:35 AM

As an affiliate of MrSkinCash.com you should use Epassporte if... your mailman is a camel jockey

Make MORE $$$ now! PussyCash
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jayeff

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#28

08-18-2005, 08:39 AM

If you have to bungee your mailbox to its post... maybe you should use ePassporte.
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Derek_M

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#29

08-18-2005, 08:39 AM

Originally posted by Rinaldo

You should use Epassporte when you're mother is a dirty homo and used to dyke out in your sandbox when you were making sandcastles 3 feet away. Not that this is any reason to use epassporte but I figured it was a nice opportunity to let some deep emotional problems out and really get back to work.

Wow... I always wondered how you became the way you are.

Derek Meklir
Chief Operating Officer
HUSTLER / LFP Inc. / Flynt Management Group LLC
ICQ: 284137502
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Linkster

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#30

08-18-2005, 08:40 AM

You should use Epassporte if the only W you like is the one in WWW

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Derek_M

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#31

08-18-2005, 08:44 AM

Originally posted by tASSy

derek: i think you should just gimme one. i like those baby blue tee's with the heads on them too, remind me to take a picture for you - the kids who work at the local drug store seem to dig it, must be something about the nipples in the middle of each guy's face

Any shirt that you wear that forces the onlookers to read exactly at boob-level is going to be a shirt that they like.

Derek Meklir
Chief Operating Officer
HUSTLER / LFP Inc. / Flynt Management Group LLC
ICQ: 284137502
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Derek_M

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#32

08-18-2005, 08:45 AM

Originally posted by Phoenix

im going to get shot down at least 20 times tonight

I can't tell if this is a post for this contest or if you are just being informative.

Derek Meklir
Chief Operating Officer
HUSTLER / LFP Inc. / Flynt Management Group LLC
ICQ: 284137502
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jayeff

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#33

08-18-2005, 08:47 AM

If you live somewhere "class" is beheading mailboxes with golf clubs instead of baseball bats... maybe you should use ePassporte.
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#34

08-18-2005, 08:54 AM

"As an affiliate of MrSkinCash.com you should use Epassporte if...."

you keep missing convention face time with your sponsor due to drunken catsup episodes
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Derek_M

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#35

08-18-2005, 08:57 AM

As an affiliate of MrSkinCash.com you should use Epassporte if... the native language of your country has click noises as words.

Derek Meklir
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HUSTLER / LFP Inc. / Flynt Management Group LLC
ICQ: 284137502
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KRosh

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#36

08-18-2005, 09:05 AM

ok here is my feeble attempt Derek.

" As an affiliate of MrSkin you should use Epassporte if your postman is so stupid that he thinks Tupac Shakur is a Jewish Holiday"

ICQ 115433750
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Phoenix

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#37

08-18-2005, 09:13 AM

Originally posted by Derek_MrSkin

I can't tell if this is a post for this contest or if you are just being informative.

haha it is my life motto

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Mr. Romance

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#38

08-18-2005, 09:14 AM

You just make sense!

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#39

08-18-2005, 09:17 AM

"As an affiliate of MrSkin you should use Epassporte "

because let's face it... getting to the bank requires actually leaving the house and we all know that you won't be doing that any time soon.

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XxXotic

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#40

08-18-2005, 09:19 AM

you should use epassporte if the local mail carrier uses a goat instead of a truck

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#41

08-18-2005, 09:20 AM

you should use epassporte if you're tired of those pesky paper cuts.

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#42

08-18-2005, 09:21 AM

Send me one "Juicy D. Links"

thanks
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#43

08-18-2005, 09:26 AM

"As an affiliate of MrSkin you should use Epassporte if..."

U 3v3r pl4n 0n sE3iNg y0ur wif3 aliVe aga1n!!11!!!!

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Derek_M

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#44

08-18-2005, 09:31 AM

Originally posted by KRosh

ok here is my feeble attempt Derek.

" As an affiliate of MrSkin you should use Epassporte if your postman is so stupid that he thinks Tupac Shakur is a Jewish Holiday"

I like that one.

Derek Meklir
Chief Operating Officer
HUSTLER / LFP Inc. / Flynt Management Group LLC
ICQ: 284137502
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CJTraffic

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#45

08-18-2005, 09:35 AM

"As an affiliate of MrSkinCash.com you should use Epassporte if you live so far out in the boondocks that your mailman is shitfaced by the time he gets to your house and just throws your mail out on the way by."

P.S. There's a deep reference there. Anybody get it?

Last edited by CJTraffic; 08-18-2005, 09:36 AM.

SIG TOO BIG! Maximum 120x60 button and no more than 3 text lines of DEFAULT SIZE and COLOR. Unless your sig is for a GFY top banner sponsor, you may use a 624x80 instead of a 120x60. Let me repeat... A 120 x 60 button and no more that 3 lines of DEFAULT SIZE AND COLOR text.
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#46

08-18-2005, 09:36 AM

As an affiliate of MrSkin you should use Epassporte if...

...you make people say the names of the companies over n over n over again, getting it embedded into their heads!
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CJTraffic

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#47

08-18-2005, 09:40 AM

As an affiliate of MrSkinCash.com you should use Epassporte if you live in your small town/Mom's basement and you don't want them to see you getting checks to "SleazyDream"

SIG TOO BIG! Maximum 120x60 button and no more than 3 text lines of DEFAULT SIZE and COLOR. Unless your sig is for a GFY top banner sponsor, you may use a 624x80 instead of a 120x60. Let me repeat... A 120 x 60 button and no more that 3 lines of DEFAULT SIZE AND COLOR text.
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#48

08-18-2005, 09:46 AM

As an affiliate of MrSkinCash.com you should use Epassporte if sister and cousin describes the same person to you.
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#49

08-18-2005, 09:53 AM

You should use Epassporte if you're sick of waiting in line at the bank.

You should use epassporte if the collection agencies are syphoning you bank accounts.

You should use epassporte if your wife spends all your money on shoes and facials.

erik AT suthnet.com
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#50

08-18-2005, 09:54 AM

Woj? you here

Tanker
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