watched "Constantine" on DVD...Don't you make the same mistake

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  • BVF
    Black Vagina Finder
    • Jan 2002
    • 13975

    #1

    watched "Constantine" on DVD...Don't you make the same mistake

    I figured that this movie "Constantine" with Keanu Reaves would be good because it's so hard to rent at blockbuster and they have a whole wall of these videos that are rented...I was able to cop one and it SUCKS...

    This idiot is walking around shooting demons with a rifle made out of a crucifix.

    Don't watch this bullshit movie.

    Oh and I have a new show up on www.mrnogood.com

    Black Pussy
    Click On Mr Cosby..CCbill, 60/40, 136 FHG's....The Cos Loves Black Ghetto Pussy!!
  • WayneBrady
    Confirmed User
    • Feb 2005
    • 148

    #2
    Constintine Hell Yeah

    While I was fuckin Mrs. Tribble I saw a light out the window
    I got up and took a look at it, and I ended up jizing on my window
    I got pissed off so I went out side naked and started screaming at the light
    The neighbors sat me naked so they called the cops
    They cops show up and yell at me for being naked in a residential area
    So I get all pissed again, I get on top of the car and pissed on the windshield
    The big nig ger one grabs me and handcuffs me
    Then they wrap me in a foil blanket and throw me in a cop car
    Then I get all pissed off again, and I took a big shit on the seat
    I smeared it in a circular motion with my crack
    Then I got violent and banged my head on the window
    Then the big nig ger one and asked me what that smell was
    So I said I took a shit, and the big nig ger one hit me
    They drove me to the station booked me, and took me in a room and told me to wait
    I waited about 30 minutes
    Then the 2 men in black came in one stands in the corner and the other sits down
    They asked me what I saw, and I told them I saw a UFO
    He then I told me I didn?t see a UFO
    I then you don?t tell me what I see
    Then he said we can make you disappear
    Then I tell them not to threaten me
    He then says we can make your wife, kids, and house disappear
    Then he pulls a paper out that said I saw a helicopter and I was drunk and high
    So I signed it, then I asked what organization they were from
    Then the one in the corner and looked at the other and the the one talking said the meeting was over
    The cops then took me and threw me into a cell
    And the next day I was released and I went home.


    Later that afternoon a black military helicopter flew over with no numbers
    So I get all pissed off and started throwing shoes at the helicopter and screaming profanities
    Then it quickly flew off
    15 minutes later a black car pulls up, and the two men in black I saw the day before confront me
    The one that didn?t talk cuffs me throws me in a sack and puts me in the trunk
    I then start yelling, and Mrs Tribble comes up with a shoe and beats the one that talked yelling I saw it
    The one that doesn?t talk pulls out a black object and hits her with it knocking her out
    They take her and throw her in the back seat and I still in the trunk in the sack
    I start to get pissed off, so I took a piss and yelled I pissed my sack, I pissed my sack
    Then they pick me up from the wet sack and put me in the trunk.
    The car then starts driving
    Were in there for 10 hours
    I had to take a shit so I decided to shit my sack
    Once we got to the destination they opened the trunk and asked whats that smell
    I then reply I shit my sack
    They pick me up and took me in a building and then a room
    They they bring Mrs Tribble in , She then starts biting the one that don?t talk so he pulls his object out and hits her again
    They put her in the corner of the room
    Then the one that talked sat me down and said ?you witnessed something that you weren?t suppose to witness that you didn?t witness
    What you saw was out of this world technology that you didn?t witness
    There are beings that come here to this world that don?t exist
    We have an actual alien being here but we don?t actually have it
    Were gonna show you it, but you didn?t see it.
    Then he says come with me?
    And then we all walked down a hall way
    We come up to a locked door that opened by DNA finger prints
    We go down another hall and in a cell is an alien standing there jizzing on us
    And we get hit with a bluish goo. The man in black that talk opened the cell and hit it with the object knocking it out cold
    While it?s on the ground it craps itself
    The one that talked said ?we showed you something that we didn?t show you
    We walk down to the gate and I see Luther Reigns in a cell
    Edd asks whats he doing here
    He replys he?s not actually here, you didn?t see him
    Walked back to the security room where Mrs Tribble is getting up
    As soon as she the men in black she throws a chair at the one that talks knocking him down
    The 2nd one hits her with object again knocking her out
    Then he dragged her out of the room and puts her in the car
    And the one that talks put me back in my sack
    I asked for a clean one and said your not in a sack it doesn?t exist
    They drive me back to my house on the way I piss my sack again.
    They take me out of the sack and Mrs Tribble bytes the one that don?t talk
    The 2nd one hits her with object again knocking her out cold
    He dragged her to the steps and left her there the one that talked said I didn?t witness anything
    He said if anyone asked where we were to tell them we weren?t anywhere.
    He says we will be watching you and digging threw your trash
    They get back in the car and dvive off

    Comment

    • kuthi123
      Confirmed User
      • Jan 2005
      • 6478

      #3
      that movie sucks

      Comment

      • Hornydog4cooter
        Confirmed User
        • Jan 2005
        • 2859

        #4
        I thought it was a good movie...

        Comment

        • jaYMan
          peace&profit,
          • Jan 2001
          • 4885

          #5
          I loved it. Always nice to see other peoples interpretations of hell. Lucifers role was kinda kick ass too.
          peace&profit,
          jaYMan

          Comment

          • WayneBrady
            Confirmed User
            • Feb 2005
            • 148

            #6
            Constintine Hell Yeah

            While I was fuckin Mrs. Tribble I saw a light out the window
            I got up and took a look at it, and I ended up jizing on my window
            I got pissed off so I went out side naked and started screaming at the light
            The neighbors sat me naked so they called the cops
            They cops show up and yell at me for being naked in a residential area
            So I get all pissed again, I get on top of the car and pissed on the windshield
            The big nig ger one grabs me and handcuffs me
            Then they wrap me in a foil blanket and throw me in a cop car
            Then I get all pissed off again, and I took a big shit on the seat
            I smeared it in a circular motion with my crack
            Then I got violent and banged my head on the window
            Then the big nig ger one and asked me what that smell was
            So I said I took a shit, and the big nig ger one hit me
            They drove me to the station booked me, and took me in a room and told me to wait
            I waited about 30 minutes
            Then the 2 men in black came in one stands in the corner and the other sits down
            They asked me what I saw, and I told them I saw a UFO
            He then I told me I didn?t see a UFO
            I then you don?t tell me what I see
            Then he said we can make you disappear
            Then I tell them not to threaten me
            He then says we can make your wife, kids, and house disappear
            Then he pulls a paper out that said I saw a helicopter and I was drunk and high
            So I signed it, then I asked what organization they were from
            Then the one in the corner and looked at the other and the the one talking said the meeting was over
            The cops then took me and threw me into a cell
            And the next day I was released and I went home.


            Later that afternoon a black military helicopter flew over with no numbers
            So I get all pissed off and started throwing shoes at the helicopter and screaming profanities
            Then it quickly flew off
            15 minutes later a black car pulls up, and the two men in black I saw the day before confront me
            The one that didn?t talk cuffs me throws me in a sack and puts me in the trunk
            I then start yelling, and Mrs Tribble comes up with a shoe and beats the one that talked yelling I saw it
            The one that doesn?t talk pulls out a black object and hits her with it knocking her out
            They take her and throw her in the back seat and I still in the trunk in the sack
            I start to get pissed off, so I took a piss and yelled I pissed my sack, I pissed my sack
            Then they pick me up from the wet sack and put me in the trunk.
            The car then starts driving
            Were in there for 10 hours
            I had to take a shit so I decided to shit my sack
            Once we got to the destination they opened the trunk and asked whats that smell
            I then reply I shit my sack
            They pick me up and took me in a building and then a room
            They they bring Mrs Tribble in , She then starts biting the one that don?t talk so he pulls his object out and hits her again
            They put her in the corner of the room
            Then the one that talked sat me down and said ?you witnessed something that you weren?t suppose to witness that you didn?t witness
            What you saw was out of this world technology that you didn?t witness
            There are beings that come here to this world that don?t exist
            We have an actual alien being here but we don?t actually have it
            Were gonna show you it, but you didn?t see it.
            Then he says come with me?
            And then we all walked down a hall way
            We come up to a locked door that opened by DNA finger prints
            We go down another hall and in a cell is an alien standing there jizzing on us
            And we get hit with a bluish goo. The man in black that talk opened the cell and hit it with the object knocking it out cold
            While it?s on the ground it craps itself
            The one that talked said ?we showed you something that we didn?t show you
            We walk down to the gate and I see Luther Reigns in a cell
            Edd asks whats he doing here
            He replys he?s not actually here, you didn?t see him
            Walked back to the security room where Mrs Tribble is getting up
            As soon as she the men in black she throws a chair at the one that talks knocking him down
            The 2nd one hits her with object again knocking her out
            Then he dragged her out of the room and puts her in the car
            And the one that talks put me back in my sack
            I asked for a clean one and said your not in a sack it doesn?t exist
            They drive me back to my house on the way I piss my sack again.
            They take me out of the sack and Mrs Tribble bytes the one that don?t talk
            The 2nd one hits her with object again knocking her out cold
            He dragged her to the steps and left her there the one that talked said I didn?t witness anything
            He said if anyone asked where we were to tell them we weren?t anywhere.
            He says we will be watching you and digging threw your trash
            They get back in the car and dvive off
            While I was fuckin Mrs. Tribble I saw a light out the window
            I got up and took a look at it, and I ended up jizing on my window
            I got pissed off so I went out side naked and started screaming at the light
            The neighbors sat me naked so they called the cops
            They cops show up and yell at me for being naked in a residential area
            So I get all pissed again, I get on top of the car and pissed on the windshield
            The big nig ger one grabs me and handcuffs me
            Then they wrap me in a foil blanket and throw me in a cop car
            Then I get all pissed off again, and I took a big shit on the seat
            I smeared it in a circular motion with my crack
            Then I got violent and banged my head on the window
            Then the big nig ger one and asked me what that smell was
            So I said I took a shit, and the big nig ger one hit me
            They drove me to the station booked me, and took me in a room and told me to wait
            I waited about 30 minutes
            Then the 2 men in black came in one stands in the corner and the other sits down
            They asked me what I saw, and I told them I saw a UFO
            He then I told me I didn?t see a UFO
            I then you don?t tell me what I see
            Then he said we can make you disappear
            Then I tell them not to threaten me
            He then says we can make your wife, kids, and house disappear
            Then he pulls a paper out that said I saw a helicopter and I was drunk and high
            So I signed it, then I asked what organization they were from
            Then the one in the corner and looked at the other and the the one talking said the meeting was over
            The cops then took me and threw me into a cell
            And the next day I was released and I went home.


            Later that afternoon a black military helicopter flew over with no numbers
            So I get all pissed off and started throwing shoes at the helicopter and screaming profanities
            Then it quickly flew off
            15 minutes later a black car pulls up, and the two men in black I saw the day before confront me
            The one that didn?t talk cuffs me throws me in a sack and puts me in the trunk
            I then start yelling, and Mrs Tribble comes up with a shoe and beats the one that talked yelling I saw it
            The one that doesn?t talk pulls out a black object and hits her with it knocking her out
            They take her and throw her in the back seat and I still in the trunk in the sack
            I start to get pissed off, so I took a piss and yelled I pissed my sack, I pissed my sack
            Then they pick me up from the wet sack and put me in the trunk.
            The car then starts driving
            Were in there for 10 hours
            I had to take a shit so I decided to shit my sack
            Once we got to the destination they opened the trunk and asked whats that smell
            I then reply I shit my sack
            They pick me up and took me in a building and then a room
            They they bring Mrs Tribble in , She then starts biting the one that don?t talk so he pulls his object out and hits her again
            They put her in the corner of the room
            Then the one that talked sat me down and said ?you witnessed something that you weren?t suppose to witness that you didn?t witness
            What you saw was out of this world technology that you didn?t witness
            There are beings that come here to this world that don?t exist
            We have an actual alien being here but we don?t actually have it
            Were gonna show you it, but you didn?t see it.
            Then he says come with me?
            And then we all walked down a hall way
            We come up to a locked door that opened by DNA finger prints
            We go down another hall and in a cell is an alien standing there jizzing on us
            And we get hit with a bluish goo. The man in black that talk opened the cell and hit it with the object knocking it out cold
            While it?s on the ground it craps itself
            The one that talked said ?we showed you something that we didn?t show you
            We walk down to the gate and I see Luther Reigns in a cell
            Edd asks whats he doing here
            He replys he?s not actually here, you didn?t see him
            Walked back to the security room where Mrs Tribble is getting up
            As soon as she the men in black she throws a chair at the one that talks knocking him down
            The 2nd one hits her with object again knocking her out
            Then he dragged her out of the room and puts her in the car
            And the one that talks put me back in my sack
            I asked for a clean one and said your not in a sack it doesn?t exist
            They drive me back to my house on the way I piss my sack again.
            They take me out of the sack and Mrs Tribble bytes the one that don?t talk
            The 2nd one hits her with object again knocking her out cold
            He dragged her to the steps and left her there the one that talked said I didn?t witness anything
            He said if anyone asked where we were to tell them we weren?t anywhere.
            He says we will be watching you and digging threw your trash
            They get back in the car and dvive off

            Comment

            • RedShoe
              赤い靴 call me 202-456-1111
              • Feb 2001
              • 14831

              #7
              Originally posted by jaYMan
              I loved it. Always nice to see other peoples interpretations of hell. Lucifers role was kinda kick ass too.
              I got to hang out with that guy. He's cool as hell.

              I actually enjoyed Constantine. Must be a white thing.

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              Comment

              • tristan_D
                Confirmed User
                • Jul 2005
                • 7865

                #8
                I think they changed so much of the story from the comic book. Have not seen it though, and I don't think I will based on what I heard from you guys.
                Increase your sales. Up to $4 per click.

                Comment

                • Big Red Machine
                  Confirmed User
                  • Jan 2005
                  • 9586

                  #9
                  I thought it was alright ,but Loved the opening scene. When that El Camino crashes into the guy. That was wild, kinda leveled off after that

                  ICQ:475437214

                  Comment

                  • SomeCreep
                    :glugglug
                    • Mar 2003
                    • 26118

                    #10
                    I liked that movie

                    Webair Hosting

                    I use and recommend Webair for hosting.

                    Comment

                    • SomeCreep
                      :glugglug
                      • Mar 2003
                      • 26118

                      #11
                      Originally posted by WayneBrady
                      ......
                      Please feel free to keep making that post 500 times per day. I've already added you to ignore

                      Webair Hosting

                      I use and recommend Webair for hosting.

                      Comment

                      • Pim(P)
                        Confirmed User
                        • Jun 2005
                        • 583

                        #12
                        I 've seen that movie some time ago and I must agree that it was the most crappy movie I have seen in a long time.

                        Comment

                        • naugthygUrL
                          Confirmed User
                          • Feb 2005
                          • 3448

                          #13
                          Originally posted by RedShoe
                          I got to hang out with that guy. He's cool as hell.

                          I actually enjoyed Constantine. Must be a white thing.
                          same here..the movie was good

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                          Comment

                          • reed_4
                            Confirmed User
                            • Jul 2005
                            • 9640

                            #14
                            i didn't even finish watching that crap.

                            Comment

                            • Warren
                              Confirmed User
                              • Jul 2003
                              • 2284

                              #15
                              Just watched that movie tonight, how are doing Big Red, I thought that first part was pretty cool too.
                              ICQ:208-603-797

                              www.altdollars.com

                              Comment

                              • SGS
                                Confirmed User
                                • Dec 2002
                                • 5176

                                #16
                                Never seen a good Keanu Reaves film.
                                See sig...

                                Comment

                                • ColourMeHuman
                                  Confirmed User
                                  • Aug 2004
                                  • 215

                                  #17
                                  Reviews of this movie have been mixed big time. I think a lot of people who don't like it don't understand it's based on a comic book story. It's not supposed to be real and have this great story behind it..it's a comic book brought to life. I thought it was a fucking cool. I can understand if this type of movie ain't your thing, but you can't denie the obvious hard work and time that went to into this film. The result was sweet eye candy. Reeves and his co stars didn't do a bad job either.

                                  Comment

                                  • je_rome
                                    Confirmed User
                                    • Jul 2005
                                    • 6846

                                    #18
                                    it was not as good as i expected. guess it was too over-rated.
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                                    Comment

                                    • Elli
                                      Reach for those stars!
                                      • Apr 2003
                                      • 17991

                                      #19
                                      I watched it the other night, and I want my $5 back. Keanu STILL can't act his way out of a wet paper bag, even when he's playing a dark, brooding character. Everyone else was good, though, and the special effects rocked.
                                      email: [email protected]

                                      Comment

                                      • Centurion
                                        Confirmed User
                                        • Dec 2002
                                        • 6033

                                        #20
                                        Originally posted by Elli
                                        I watched it the other night, and I want my $5 back. Keanu STILL can't act his way out of a wet paper bag, even when he's playing a dark, brooding character. Everyone else was good, though, and the special effects rocked.

                                        Agreed..he was ATROCIOUS in the movie.
                                        The only thing worse than his acting was THE MOVIE!

                                        Comment

                                        • reynold
                                          Too lazy to set a custom title
                                          • Oct 2002
                                          • 51271

                                          #21
                                          i would want to see this film, kinda curious bout what's with this movie.

                                          Comment

                                          • budz
                                            Disruptive Innovator
                                            • Sep 2003
                                            • 4230

                                            #22
                                            rofl, did he say "whoa" in it haha
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                                            Comment

                                            • hova
                                              Traffillionaire
                                              • Jan 2002
                                              • 22430

                                              #23
                                              I watched it, and it sucked....I can not understand how anybody can like it
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                                              Comment

                                              • Cassie
                                                Confirmed User
                                                • Mar 2003
                                                • 3139

                                                #24
                                                Originally posted by BVF
                                                I figured that this movie "Constantine" with Keanu Reaves would be good because it's so hard to rent at blockbuster and they have a whole wall of these videos that are rented...I was able to cop one and it SUCKS...

                                                This idiot is walking around shooting demons with a rifle made out of a crucifix.

                                                Don't watch this bullshit movie.

                                                Oh and I have a new show up on www.mrnogood.com
                                                i made the mistake of seeing it in the movies back in feb or mar. i never fall asleep in a theater but this one had me well rested after it was over. best 8 bucks ever spent for a nap.
                                                ICQ: 309756847
                                                ]

                                                Comment

                                                • StuartD
                                                  Sofa King Band
                                                  • Jul 2002
                                                  • 29903

                                                  #25
                                                  Originally posted by Big Red Machine
                                                  I thought it was alright ,but Loved the opening scene. When that El Camino crashes into the guy. That was wild, kinda leveled off after that
                                                  If I picked movies based on gfy opinions, I'd never see a movie again.

                                                  I don't think there's ever been a movie that gfy hasn't bashed.
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                                                  Comment

                                                  • SGS
                                                    Confirmed User
                                                    • Dec 2002
                                                    • 5176

                                                    #26
                                                    Originally posted by Elli
                                                    I watched it the other night, and I want my $5 back. Keanu STILL can't act his way out of a wet paper bag, even when he's playing a dark, brooding character. Everyone else was good, though, and the special effects rocked.
                                                    Keanu Reaves is as wooden as Elizabeth the 1sts dildo.
                                                    See sig...

                                                    Comment

                                                    • coding_bug
                                                      Registered User
                                                      • Jul 2005
                                                      • 100

                                                      #27
                                                      constantine rocks!!

                                                      Comment

                                                      • reynold
                                                        Too lazy to set a custom title
                                                        • Oct 2002
                                                        • 51271

                                                        #28
                                                        I've seen it on Silverscreen, and I don't consider watching it a big mistake.

                                                        Comment

                                                        • imafuckingaussie
                                                          Confirmed User
                                                          • Jul 2003
                                                          • 1497

                                                          #29
                                                          I thought it rocked, best demons and depiction of hell I've seen in a movie.

                                                          You can get it ploughing a paddock, you can get it makin some porn sites, matter of fact I've got it now.

                                                          For a hard earned thrist, you need a big cold beer.

                                                          Comment

                                                          • eroswebmaster
                                                            March 1st, 2003
                                                            • Jul 2001
                                                            • 20295

                                                            #30
                                                            I watched it...I was entertained..that's all I ask for.

                                                            Did I learn something valuable about life? No. that's what "very special Blossom" episodes are for. ;)
                                                            For rent - ICQ 127-027-910
                                                            Click here for more details

                                                            Comment

                                                            • BVF
                                                              Black Vagina Finder
                                                              • Jan 2002
                                                              • 13975

                                                              #31
                                                              Originally posted by imafuckingaussie
                                                              I thought it rocked, best demons and depiction of hell I've seen in a movie.
                                                              The special effects were good but that doesn't make a movie...

                                                              And why would they have broken down cars and burning buildings in hell?

                                                              Black Pussy
                                                              Click On Mr Cosby..CCbill, 60/40, 136 FHG's....The Cos Loves Black Ghetto Pussy!!

                                                              Comment

                                                              • slackologist
                                                                Confirmed User
                                                                • Jul 2002
                                                                • 2379

                                                                #32
                                                                not a bad flick. moderately entertaining.. overall not a great movie.. but it had some interesting scenes and the story was refreshingly different.

                                                                Comment

                                                                • slackologist
                                                                  Confirmed User
                                                                  • Jul 2002
                                                                  • 2379

                                                                  #33
                                                                  Originally posted by BVF
                                                                  The special effects were good but that doesn't make a movie...

                                                                  And why would they have broken down cars and burning buildings in hell?
                                                                  i guess it's not based on the 'real' hell?

                                                                  Comment

                                                                  • eroswebmaster
                                                                    March 1st, 2003
                                                                    • Jul 2001
                                                                    • 20295

                                                                    #34
                                                                    Originally posted by BVF
                                                                    The special effects were good but that doesn't make a movie...

                                                                    And why would they have broken down cars and burning buildings in hell?
                                                                    Why not?

                                                                    My perception of hell if there was one has always been that it's not really this lake full of fire and brimstone, but could be just an episode in your life that you play over and over.

                                                                    Just another person's concept of what hell might be...I thought it looked pretty cool.
                                                                    For rent - ICQ 127-027-910
                                                                    Click here for more details

                                                                    Comment

                                                                    • Steve
                                                                      Confirmed User
                                                                      • Feb 2001
                                                                      • 6894

                                                                      #35
                                                                      Originally posted by NichePay - StuartD
                                                                      If I picked movies based on gfy opinions, I'd never see a movie again.

                                                                      I don't think there's ever been a movie that gfy hasn't bashed.
                                                                      yeah, no shit

                                                                      GFY is way harsher than Siskel and Ebert

                                                                      Comment

                                                                      • loverboy
                                                                        When it rains, it pours
                                                                        • May 2003
                                                                        • 20609

                                                                        #36
                                                                        missing lots of movie watching lately.
                                                                        should be an interesting flick to watch.

                                                                        Comment

                                                                        • TDF
                                                                          Triple OG nigga on GFY
                                                                          • Mar 2002
                                                                          • 27296

                                                                          #37
                                                                          hell would be run by south central thugs
                                                                          Sig heil

                                                                          Comment

                                                                          • Jakke PNG
                                                                            ex-TeenGodFather
                                                                            • Nov 2001
                                                                            • 20306

                                                                            #38
                                                                            I like lucifer. I like lucifer movies. He kicks ass.
                                                                            He was pretty much the only thing I liked in the movie.
                                                                            ..and I'm off.

                                                                            Comment

                                                                            • LittleSassy
                                                                              Confirmed User
                                                                              • May 2005
                                                                              • 7402

                                                                              #39
                                                                              the movie was kinda crap....

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                                                                              Comment

                                                                              • Jakke PNG
                                                                                ex-TeenGodFather
                                                                                • Nov 2001
                                                                                • 20306

                                                                                #40
                                                                                Originally posted by TDF
                                                                                hell would be run by south central thugs
                                                                                I'd say finnish taxman would be closer to the truth.
                                                                                ..and I'm off.

                                                                                Comment

                                                                                • wedouglas
                                                                                  So Fucking Banned
                                                                                  • Aug 2004
                                                                                  • 5921

                                                                                  #41
                                                                                  You guys are crazy. Constantine was sweet. Great comic book movie.

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