Funny Craigslist Ad... The Girl I Have Dated

Collapse
X
 
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts
  • DutchTeenCash
    I like Dutch Girls
    • Feb 2003
    • 21684

    #1

    Funny Craigslist Ad... The Girl I Have Dated

    http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/pdx/203730169.html

    The Girls I Have Dated
    Date: 2006-09-06, 10:30AM PDT


    Mindy - You were my first and you said I was yours(?). It was thrilling probably because it was new. Truth be told, I was in such a rush. I just wanted to do it with somebody. I never would date you today. You are smart, but very needy. I don't know why I still stay in touch with you.

    Claire Bear - You were very unattractive, but your sister was cute. And yet I chose to sleep with you. A pattern was starting to develop. Sorry if I caused a problem between the two of you. Hope things turned out OK.

    Mrs. Hahn - I don't even know your first name. But I don't feel badly because I don't think you even knew you slept with me after that New Year's Eve party, you were so drunk. Although you did insist I cum inside you. You know something funny, I ran into you a few years ago. I saw you down by the waterfront with your husband. I started chatting with you but you didn't recognize me. You just thought I was a kind stranger. You're screwed up. There are laws out there you know. I regret the sex even if you don't. Guess I've changed a lot since I was 17.

    Beth - My first slut. How many guys in the dorm did you do? Don't get me wrong, you were great in bed, but it was a little unnerving every week seeing a different guy coming out of your room. You were smart and sassy - you should have respected yourself more. But thanks for the great BJs.

    Judith - You were very unattractive. I slept with you because I thought that's the best I deserved. I see now that I was lacking in self esteem. But still, you smelled wonderful and I think you are a good person. You could lose some weight, but it wouldn't really matter because you would still be ugly. Sorry about pissing in your mouth. I liked it, but I don't think you did.

    Kim - My fellow lab intern. You met me one day and came on to me. You asked me over for dinner and we fucked. Can I tell you the truth, it was like a Seinfeld episode - I didn't know your name. Yeah, you told me that afternoon, but I had forgotten. I had to check your time card the next morning in the lab. The sex was uneventful. I think you just wanted to betray some boyfriend. I didn't really care.

    (click for all the other girls on the first link)

    ICQ 16 91 547 - SKYPE dutchteencash
    bob AT dutchteencash DOT com
    ... did you see our newest Sweet Natural Girl Priscilla (18)?
  • King of Queens
    Confirmed User
    • Aug 2006
    • 1288

    #2
    that would made a good blog post
    Emails = $3.50 each | girls gone wild | Big Booty | Big Booty Videos

    Comment

    • Jakke PNG
      ex-TeenGodFather
      • Nov 2001
      • 20306

      #3
      Paula - I'm just not ready to say anything here. I'll give this one sentence and then move on. You are my s****r and that should never have happened.

      :
      ..and I'm off.

      Comment

      • tehHinjew
        Confirmed User
        • Sep 2006
        • 5755

        #4
        LOL i just opend up gfy to post that line but too late

        Hot Porn Wanna trade? email me at wanker (@) wanknation dot com

        Comment

        • Fred Quimby
          Confirmed User
          • Jul 2004
          • 5430

          #5
          Hanna - You were the most boring girl I've ever endured. Who goes shopping for a pen? You want a pen, look between my couch pillows. There are a dozen pens in there. What a painfully dull bitch you are. And the sex was embarrassing. I cum on your face and you pat my back saying, "There, there. That's OK. Accidents happen." News flash, I came on your face to degrade you. And you react like a mother soothing a child with a scraped knee. You're boring and you're an idiot!

          Comment

          • marko13
            Confirmed User
            • Apr 2004
            • 7512

            #6
            it can't be true....
            We are responsible for your hosting ... Enjoy in your life.
            Shared hosting from $3.95 Europe Linux VPS plans from $11.37
            http://www.LVPSHosting.com

            Comment

            • CaptainHowdy
              Too lazy to set a custom title
              • Dec 2004
              • 94026

              #7
              Lol !!

              Comment

              • natas
                Confirmed User
                • Mar 2002
                • 3377

                #8
                "At first I thought you might be a hooker, but then I realized you were too unattractive for anybody to pay. By the third time I saw you there, I recognized the look - I knew you were just a desperate woman wanting to hear something that no one was ever going to be able to tell you. So I offered you a ride, spent about $5 at 7-11 to buy some beers and fucked you doggie style because I didn't want to see your face. You were in need. I was in need. I never even asked your name."

                fucking great read some classics in there

                Comment

                • Deputy Chief Command
                  Deputy Chief Command
                  • Nov 2005
                  • 4482

                  #9
                  http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/all/



                  all the best of craigslist

                  Comment

                  • NickPapageorgio
                    Confirmed User
                    • Apr 2004
                    • 8323

                    #10
                    Originally posted by Fred Quimby
                    Hanna - You were the most boring girl I've ever endured. Who goes shopping for a pen? You want a pen, look between my couch pillows. There are a dozen pens in there. What a painfully dull bitch you are. And the sex was embarrassing. I cum on your face and you pat my back saying, "There, there. That's OK. Accidents happen." News flash, I came on your face to degrade you. And you react like a mother soothing a child with a scraped knee. You're boring and you're an idiot!

                    Comment

                    • DutchTeenCash
                      I like Dutch Girls
                      • Feb 2003
                      • 21684

                      #11
                      Originally posted by Fred Quimby
                      Hanna - You were the most boring girl I've ever endured. Who goes shopping for a pen? You want a pen, look between my couch pillows. There are a dozen pens in there. What a painfully dull bitch you are. And the sex was embarrassing. I cum on your face and you pat my back saying, "There, there. That's OK. Accidents happen." News flash, I came on your face to degrade you. And you react like a mother soothing a child with a scraped knee. You're boring and you're an idiot!
                      hahaha yeah that one was funny

                      ICQ 16 91 547 - SKYPE dutchteencash
                      bob AT dutchteencash DOT com
                      ... did you see our newest Sweet Natural Girl Priscilla (18)?

                      Comment

                      • dennisthemenace
                        Confirmed User
                        • Feb 2003
                        • 2668

                        #12
                        hehe

                        Meagan - You are the poster child of what can go wrong with long term use of prescription drugs. You are destined to forever be medicated. Here are some things you shouldn't do: Don't turn to the table next to us in a restaurant and ask if the fellow is done with his cake. I don't know who was more horrified when you ate it, me or him. And don't take a leak in a subway car. Even the homeless know how to hold it better than you. I can only imagine that was the drugs fucking up your frontal lobe. But I will say something kind about you. You loved it in the ass, "Yes, fuck me in the ass! Fuck me deep and make it hurt!" You were at least good for something.

                        All the best to you

                        Comment

                        • squishypimp
                          PostMaster General
                          • Aug 2006
                          • 10781

                          #13
                          Originally posted by TeenGodFather
                          Paula - I'm just not ready to say anything here. I'll give this one sentence and then move on. You are my s****r and that should never have happened.

                          :
                          lol

                          Comment

                          • madawgz
                            8.8.8.8
                            • Mar 2006
                            • 30509

                            #14
                            Originally posted by thinkx
                            Judith -........You could lose some weight, but it wouldn't really matter because you would still be ugly. Sorry about pissing in your mouth. I liked it, but I don't think you did.
                            LOL
                            TAEMDLRMSKRJIXMRLSMRJ.

                            Comment

                            Working...