iwantchixx

I know I will get a lot of haters giving me shit and crying about personal stuff on the board but if I don't get this off my chest I will fucking BLOW a gasket soon and end up hurting someone BADLY.....

It all started when I met this girl online a couple months ago. We hit it off instantly. We met a couple days later and it was like I met an angel. We hit it off even more so. We stayed out until the sun came up. The next day, the same thing and I got a taste of what this woman has to offer in many ways. Everything was a perfect match, physically, personality and sexually.

After a few more dates like that she confessed she was falling in love with me and I confessed the same. I have never felt this way in my entire life. Never had I been so excited about a woman ever. The fact that she had 4 kids whom I adore and seemed to really take to me added to everything good about her.

The kid's father was the one watching the kids while she was out with me and when I was over at her place I was pushed a little bit by her to see how well the kids would take to me in daily routine stuff such as bed time, feeding times, diapper changes etc. I swear her 4 kids are less of a handful than my own son. Insane.

Anyways, planned dates started getting cancelled due to the father not willing to watch the kids for her. I figured that was understandable but I was willing to go over and see her at her place instead. Well, he was there. Ok.. he just didnt like the idea of her out on a date while he was stuck at her place. Fine.

He got a job out west and moved. Before he moved she turned very volatile and emotional. I couldnt understand it. She was starting to pick fights with me and eventually I had enough and confronted her and made her tell me what the deal is. This happened twice. First time it was because she felt she would just end up alone and never marry. She wanted to get me so mad that I would tell her how much i was in love with her and I promised to marry her a year from the day we met if our love for each other kept growing. Whichw as fine with me. This i the first time I ever though about marrying a woman and I was excited. The second time she became volatile was when she went from nice to very emotional again and told me it was because she didnt know how she was going to handle the kids alone without the kid's father around and was considering to move out west so the kids could be with him. I was invited to go but only a year later after she'd be settled out there. Then the topic of the wedding came up and she wanted ot marry in June and bring me back with her in June. Ok. I was fine with that. Then she'd wait until June tomove but marry first.

He was gone, I was over a few days later at her place to help babysit the kids while she picked up a few shifts from her old job. That few days turned into 3 weeks. Durig those 3 weeks she went from never wanting me away from her side to telling "dont fuckign touch me im too warm" or that she was too cranky. Ok.. this is how she deals with stress or not feeling well. Fine. I kept my distance but after a week of that I pakce dup my shit and told her I was going home and never comming back untils he learned to open up to me as to what's eating away at her.

A couple days later after having to convince her it's just an argument and wanting to give her time and not to dump me she came around and became cudly and affecitonate again and confessed the following:

She is still not over her ex. She depended and controlled him so much she cannot see herself ebign able to get by without him jumping at her every whim. She used him to go out, she used him as a babysitter and used him to do everything she wanted. Was like that most of their 8 year relationship too. She has no love for him, no emotional attahcment and no sexual desires for him and that she will get counseling to learn to deal with issues and how to set herself free of him. We agreed me moving in would be a bad idea this soona nd that we would step back a bit. I told her to take a week to herself.




continuation...