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Old 11-26-2002, 10:24 AM  
macroguru
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Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: Somewhere out west
Posts: 260
Ass Kissing is Everything

Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%? We
have all been to those meetings where someone wants over 100%. How about
achieving 103%? Here's a little math that might prove helpful.


What makes life 100%?


If:


A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z


is represented as:


1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26.


Then:


H A R D W O R K
8 1 18 4 23 15 18 11 = 98%


K N O W L E D G E
11 14 15 23 12 5 4 7 5 = 96%


But,


A T T I T U D E
1 20 20 9 20 21 4 5 = 100%


And,


B U L L S H I T
2 21 12 12 19 8 9 20 = 103%


So, it stands to reason that hard work and knowledge will get you close,
attitude will get you there, and bullshit will put you over the top.


But, look how far ass kissing will take you.


A S S K I S S I N G
1 19 19 11 9 19 19 9 14 7 = 118%
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