Ok this wont work for most of you as it requires the basic element of having a willing partner. If you do not have a willing partner please check www.acemassage.net for cheap whores.
1) Right for starters have a fucking bath. The bath is the room were you usually spend a few hours in on Saturday night with your head down the toilet saying to yourself "Fuck me I am not drinking again".
2) Take her somewhere nice. I am taking my girl to this zoo tomorrow http://www.zsl.org/whipsnade/ it is a huge place and the animals arent really in captivity as they arent in cages but huge outdoor reserves.
3) Dont act a wanker all day trying to prove how cool you are knowing everything about everything.
4) Remember sexism does exist when ladies want it to. You buy everything but make out as though ladies are our equals (yeah fucking right tell that to my accountant).
5) Dont drink any alcoholic drinks. Dont eat shit either. When food is called for hit a cafe not McDonalds.
6) Make sure your house is tidy when you get back. There is an invention called the 'washing machine' put your bed sheets in there the day before.
7) Listen to her, remember your vocie bores the shit out of her while hers is poetry in motion to her ears. Also make out as though you actually give a fuck about her yoga classes.
If she doesnt give it up after this get some Rohypnol shove it in her drink and remember condoms arent just to prevent the spread of HIV/AIDS and prevent babies but they also enable you to pass the DNA test.
1) Right for starters have a fucking bath. The bath is the room were you usually spend a few hours in on Saturday night with your head down the toilet saying to yourself "Fuck me I am not drinking again".
2) Take her somewhere nice. I am taking my girl to this zoo tomorrow http://www.zsl.org/whipsnade/ it is a huge place and the animals arent really in captivity as they arent in cages but huge outdoor reserves.
3) Dont act a wanker all day trying to prove how cool you are knowing everything about everything.
4) Remember sexism does exist when ladies want it to. You buy everything but make out as though ladies are our equals (yeah fucking right tell that to my accountant).
5) Dont drink any alcoholic drinks. Dont eat shit either. When food is called for hit a cafe not McDonalds.
6) Make sure your house is tidy when you get back. There is an invention called the 'washing machine' put your bed sheets in there the day before.
7) Listen to her, remember your vocie bores the shit out of her while hers is poetry in motion to her ears. Also make out as though you actually give a fuck about her yoga classes.
If she doesnt give it up after this get some Rohypnol shove it in her drink and remember condoms arent just to prevent the spread of HIV/AIDS and prevent babies but they also enable you to pass the DNA test.
~Accepting design works~ 
...nice.. you must be really lucky to have someone with good sense!
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