Here's by far the best one I got. Guy went on his honeymoon, told me he would be back in a week, and got this excuse 2 1/2 weeks later...
"I got married and went on my honeymoon and my wife took some pregnancy pills that werent prescribed to her. And shes been really fucked up. She keeps shitting and puking all over the place non stop. I had to take care of her."
Now this might have been true but, the fact that the dude is telling me his new wife is shiting and puking all over the place killed me. I couldn't stop laughing.
Hope he doesn't read this LOLLL
|