Who likes chili?

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  • AndrewKanuck
    Confirmed User
    • Jan 2004
    • 6706

    #1

    Who likes chili?

    Let's hear your recipe's

    I'll share mine (be ready to not shit right for 5 days) -

    Ingredients you'll need:
    ----------------------
    2.5lbs hamburger (the lean shit)
    2 large onions
    2 28oz cans of kidney beans, the spiced kind made for chili
    2 large jars of Salsa with beans
    2 cans of tomato paste
    Some celery
    mushrooms
    green pepper
    red pepper
    1 jar of hot banana peppers
    various hot sauces
    chili powder, and lots of it
    crushed chilis, and lots of 'em
    1 pkg of chili spice
    garlic
    salt
    pepper
    beer
    tequila

    to cook:
    ----------------
    Dice the onions and saute them, then add the celery and green and red peppers. Add spices. Fry up the burger, then drain it and add spices. Mix in the vegetables keeping it all heated. Now put the whole goddamned mess in a big ass pot and heat the bejesus out of it, stirring and spicing it all to hell as the day wears on while adding a generous amount of the banana peppers. Dump in a few shots of tequila and a few splashes of beer from time to time. Drink copious amounts of both during the day as well.

    Usually a good simmer for about 4 hours while adding tequila, beer, and hot sauce until you reached your desired level, is good.

    Server in a bowl, on a plate surrounded by tortilla chips, add 3 slices of dried pepper and some shredded cheese for good looks. I usually serve it up with bruschetta & ceasar salad and more tequila & beer.
  • Spunky
    I need a beer
    • Jun 2002
    • 133978

    #2
    I like chilli but the gas is terrible... That looks great btw

    Comment

    • MatthewGood
      Registered User
      • Aug 2004
      • 89

      #3
      Its a good idea to eat a lot of that stuff if you're having guests over, then you can entertain them with a lot funny sounds...

      Comment

      • jscott
        jscizzle
        • Feb 2001
        • 25452

        #4
        chili is 1 of my favs
        If you think tough men are dangerous, wait until you see what weak men are capable of.
        - Jordan B. Peterson
        Listen to Pomp tell why is Bitcoin important

        Comment

        • IRQ0
          Confirmed User
          • Dec 2004
          • 144

          #5
          I am a chili head. I love those damn things. There are two types that I make, a dipping chili like you mentioned and a true chili. With my dipping version I also add corn, brown sugar and regular brown beans.

          When I want real chili I use this recipe and change it as I feel like that dy or depending upon what I have in stock.

          Puppy's Breath Chili
          World Champion 1993

          Source: Cathy Wilkey
          Submitted By: www.chilicookoff.com
          Ingredients:
          3 - Pounds Tri Tip Beef or Sirloin Tip cut in small pieces or coarse ground
          2 - tsps Wesson Oil
          1 - Small yellow onion
          1 - 14½ oz can of beef broth
          3½ Tbls ground cumin
          ½ - tsp of oregano
          6 - Cloves garlic (finely chopped)
          3 - Tbls of Gebhardt Chili Powder
          1 - Tbls New Mexico mild chili powder
          5-6 Tbls of California chili powder
          1 - 8 oz can of Hunts tomato sauce
          1 - Dried New Mexico chili peppers, boiled and puréed
          3 - Dried California chili peppers, boiled and puréed
          1 - 14½ oz can of chicken broth
          1 - tsp of Tabasco pepper sauce
          1 - tsp of brown sugar
          1 - Lime
          Dash of MSG
          Salt to taste
          Instructions:
          Brown meat in Wesson Oil for about ½ hour over medium heat.
          Add onion and enough beef broth to cover meat.
          Bring to a boil and cook for 15 minutes.
          Add 1 Tbls cumin and ½ tsp of Oregano.
          Reduce heat to light boil and add ½ of the garlic.
          Add ½ half of the chili powder and cook for 10 minutes.
          Add Hunts tomato sauce with the pulp from the dried peppers and remaining garlic.
          Add any remaining beef broth and chicken broth for desired consistency.
          Cook for one hour on medium heat stirring occasionally.
          Add remaining chili powders and cumin
          Simmer for 25 minutes on low to medium heat, stirring occasionally.
          Turn up heat to light boil and add Tabasco pepper sauce, salt to taste, brown sugar and juice of lime.
          Simmer on medium heat until you are ready to enter this championship recipe at your next cookoff or to a group of hungry chili lovers. Keep your Pot Hot!

          Check out this site if you have not done so already: http://www.chilicookoff.com/default.asp

          Cheers, and don't forget the gloves when cooking with habanero peppers. I burnt my X's pussy one night many hours after cooking chili... Any other burn stories?

          NudeCelebHound.com - $20 per FREE signup!
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          Sadonecrobeastiality: beating a dead horse.

          Comment

          • Easton
            Too lazy to set a custom title
            • Sep 2002
            • 9825

            #6
            i enjoy a good spicy chili sometimes, but i gotta have plain white bread with it
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            Comment

            • who
              So Fucking Banned
              • Aug 2003
              • 19593

              #7
              I do it thus:

              1 can of chilli

              Place contents of can in microwave for approximately 2 minutes on high.

              Serve.

              Enjoy.

              Comment

              • AsianDivaGirlsWebDude
                Purveyor, Fine Asian Porn
                • Jul 2004
                • 38323

                #8
                What We Need is a GFY Chili Cook-Off

                I once had to judge a fraternity chili cook-off. Big mistake.

                Anyway, years later I came across this joke, and it brought back some memories - I know it's old and some of you have seen it already, but for the benefit of those who haven't, here it goes...

                "Recently, I was honored to be selected as a judge at
                a chili cook-off. The original person called in sick
                at the last moment and I happened to be standing
                there at the judge's table asking directions where I
                could find the Budweiser truck, when the call came
                in.

                I was assured by the other two Judges (Native
                Texans) that the chili wouldn't be all that spicy and,
                besides, they told me I could have free beer during
                the tasting, so I accepted."

                Here are the scorecards from the event:

                Chili # 1 Mike's Maniac Mobster Monster Chili

                Judge #1--A little too heavy on the tomato. Amusing
                kick.

                Judge #2--Nice, smooth, tomato flavor. Very mild.

                Judge #3--(me). Holy SHIT, what the hell is this
                stuff? You could remove dried paint from your
                driveway. Took me two beers to put the flames out. I
                hope that's the worst one. These Texans are crazy.

                Chili # 2 Arthur's Afterburner Chili

                Judge #1--Smoky, with a hint of pork. Slight jalapeno
                tang.

                Judge #2--Exciting BBQ flavor, needs more peppers to
                be taken seriously.

                Judge #3--Keep this out of the reach of children. I'm
                not sure what I'm supposed to taste besides pain. I
                had to wave off two people who wanted to give me the
                Heimlich maneuver. They had to rush in more beer when
                they saw the look on my face.

                Chili # 3 Fred's Famous Burn Down the Barn Chili

                Judge #1--Excellent firehouse chili. Great kick. Needs
                more beans.

                Judge #2--A bean less chili, a bit salty, good use of
                peppers.

                Judge #3--Call the EPA. I've located a uranium spill.
                My nose feels like I've been snorting Drano. Everyone
                knows the routine by now. Get me more beer before I
                ignite. Barmaid pounded me on the back, now my
                backbone is in the front part of my chest. Plus, I'm
                getting shit-faced from all of the beer.

                Chili # 4 Bubba's Black Magic

                Judge #1--Black bean chili with almost no spice.
                Disappointing.

                Judge #2--Hint of lime in the black beans. Good side
                dish for fish or other mild foods, not much of a
                chili.

                Judge #3--I felt something scraping across my tongue,
                but was unable to taste it. Is it possible to burn out
                taste buds? Sally, the barmaid, was standing behind me
                with fresh refills. That 300 pound bitch is starting
                to look HOT - just like this nuclear waste I'm eating.
                Is chili an aphrodisiac?

                Chili # 5 Linda's Legal Lip Remover

                Judge #1--Meaty, strong chili. Cayenne peppers freshly
                ground, adding considerable kick. Very impressive.

                Judge #2--Chili using shredded beef, could use more
                tomato. Must admit the cayenne peppers make a strong
                statement.

                Judge #3--My ears are ringing, sweat is pouring off my
                forehead and I can no longer focus my eyes. I farted
                and four people behind me needed paramedics. The
                contestant seemed offended when I told her that her
                chili had given me brain damage. Sally saved my tongue
                from bleeding by pouring beer directly on it from the
                pitcher. I wonder if I'm burning my lips off. It
                really pisses me off that the other judges asked me to
                stop screaming. Screw those rednecks!

                Chili # 6 Vera's Very Vegetarian Variety

                Judge #1--Thin yet bold vegetarian variety chili. Good
                balance of spices and peppers.

                Judge #2--The best yet. Aggressive use of peppers,
                onions, and garlic. Superb.

                Judge #3--My intestines are now a straight pipe filled
                with gaseous, sulfuric flames. I shit myself when I
                farted and I'm worried it will eat through the chair.
                No one seems inclined to stand behind me except that
                slut Sally. She must be kinkier than I thought. Can't
                feel my lips anymore. I need to wipe my ass with a
                snow cone.

                Chili # 7 Susan's Screaming Sensation Chili

                Judge #1--A mediocre chili with too much reliance on
                canned peppers.

                Judge #2--Ho hum, tastes as if the chef literally
                threw in a can of chili peppers at the last moment. I
                should take note that I am worried about Judge #3, he
                appears to be in a bit of distress as he is cursing
                uncontrollably.

                Judge #3--You could put a grenade in my mouth, pull
                the pin, and I wouldn't feel a thing. I've lost sight
                in one eye, and the world sounds like it is made of
                rushing water. My shirt is covered with chili, which
                slides unnoticed out of my mouth. My pants are full of
                lava-like shit to match my shirt. At least during the
                autopsy, they'll know what killed me. I've decided to
                stop breathing, its too painful. Screw it; I'm not
                getting any oxygen anyway. If I need air, I'll just
                suck it in through the 4-inch hole in my stomach.

                Chili #8 Tommy's Toenail Curling Chili

                Judge #1--The perfect ending, this is a nice blend
                chili. Not too bold but spicy enough to declare its
                existence.

                Judge #2--This final entry is a good, balance chili.
                Neither mild nor hot. Sorry to see that most of it was
                lost when

                Judge # 3 passed out, fell over and pulled
                the chili pot down on top of himself. Not sure if he's
                going to make it. Poor bugger, I wonder how he'd have
                reacted to a really hot chili?

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                Comment

                • reynold
                  Too lazy to set a custom title
                  • Oct 2002
                  • 51271

                  #9
                  Love this thread.

                  Comment

                  • abyss_al
                    **LOOKING FOR TRADES**
                    • Oct 2003
                    • 15605

                    #10
                    cool thread.. i love chilli
                    EMAIL: allen @ vasmediagroup.com | ICQ: 311329761 | SKYPE: abyss.al | AIM: xABYSSxALx

                    Comment

                    • Sosa
                      In Tushy Land
                      • Oct 2002
                      • 40149

                      #11
                      chilli is great

                      Comment

                      • $5 submissions
                        I help you SUCCEED
                        • Nov 2003
                        • 32189

                        #12
                        I love a great bowl of Chili. This thread actually makes me miss the greatest Chiliburgers in the world... TOMMY'S BURGERS

                        Comment

                        • Iron Mike
                          Confirmed User
                          • Nov 2004
                          • 460

                          #13
                          Indians do

                          Comment

                          • nofx
                            Too lazy to set a custom title
                            • Nov 2002
                            • 16826

                            #14
                            I like to poo a lot

                            Often times I wonder why
                            There's love and hate, theres live or die.
                            When sickness comes I must decide:
                            When feelings go, theres suicide.

                            Comment

                            • Big Red Machine
                              Confirmed User
                              • Jan 2005
                              • 9586

                              #15
                              ADGWebDude thats some funny stuff . I'm not big on the Real Hot Chili. My sister-inlaw would make this Chili-dip in the oven with melted Monterey jack. Dam I just sit in front of it till its gone. Heck even the Wendys Chili I would get that with the melted Cheddar ,dam now you got me hunger. Good thing theres a 24 hr Wendys 5 minutes away

                              ICQ:475437214

                              Comment

                              • spideriux
                                Registered User
                                • Feb 2005
                                • 17227

                                #16
                                I very like chili
                                FreeOnes

                                Comment

                                • nastysam
                                  Confirmed User
                                  • Feb 2005
                                  • 174

                                  #17
                                  Originally posted by AndrewKanuck
                                  Let's hear your recipe's

                                  I'll share mine (be ready to not shit right for 5 days) -

                                  Ingredients you'll need:
                                  ----------------------
                                  2.5lbs hamburger (the lean shit)
                                  2 large onions
                                  2 28oz cans of kidney beans, the spiced kind made for chili
                                  2 large jars of Salsa with beans
                                  2 cans of tomato paste
                                  Some celery
                                  mushrooms
                                  green pepper
                                  red pepper
                                  1 jar of hot banana peppers
                                  various hot sauces
                                  chili powder, and lots of it
                                  crushed chilis, and lots of 'em
                                  1 pkg of chili spice
                                  garlic
                                  salt
                                  pepper
                                  beer
                                  tequila

                                  to cook:
                                  ----------------
                                  Dice the onions and saute them, then add the celery and green and red peppers. Add spices. Fry up the burger, then drain it and add spices. Mix in the vegetables keeping it all heated. Now put the whole goddamned mess in a big ass pot and heat the bejesus out of it, stirring and spicing it all to hell as the day wears on while adding a generous amount of the banana peppers. Dump in a few shots of tequila and a few splashes of beer from time to time. Drink copious amounts of both during the day as well.

                                  Usually a good simmer for about 4 hours while adding tequila, beer, and hot sauce until you reached your desired level, is good.

                                  Server in a bowl, on a plate surrounded by tortilla chips, add 3 slices of dried pepper and some shredded cheese for good looks. I usually serve it up with bruschetta & ceasar salad and more tequila & beer.
                                  I s good to learn something everyday, new recipe,cool. Tomarrow thats my lunch :food-smil

                                  [email protected]
                                  "Your Premier Adult Entertainment Network"

                                  Comment

                                  • AsianDivaGirlsWebDude
                                    Purveyor, Fine Asian Porn
                                    • Jul 2004
                                    • 38323

                                    #18
                                    Dude's Survival Tip #39

                                    If you are jonesing for some chili, but don't have much time, a can of Stagg's Chili with shredded cheddar and diced onions will pull you through.

                                    I'll be trying some of the recipes from above and the links.

                                    Good eating <fart...ahhh>,

                                    ADG Webmaster
                                    Asian Diva Girls - Exclusive Photos and Videos



                                    Asian Diva Girls Affiliate Program (50% ccBill Revshare)

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