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You are an EXTREME Redneck if... You are an EXTREME Redneck if...
Discuss what's fucking going on, and which programs are best and worst. One-time "program" announcements from "established" webmasters are allowed.

 
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Old 09-18-2010, 07:11 AM   #1
BFT3K
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You are an EXTREME Redneck if...
1. You let your 14-year-old daughter smoke at the dinner table in front of her kids.

2. The Blue Book value of your truck goes up and down depending on how much gas is in it.

3. You've been married three times and still have the same in-laws.

4. You think a woman who is out of your league bowls on a different night.

5. You wonder how service stations keep their rest-rooms so clean.

6. Someone in your family died right after saying "Hey, guys, watch this".

7. You think Dom Perignon is a Mafia leader.

8. Your wife's hairdo was once ruined by a ceiling fan.

9. Your junior prom offered day care.

10. You think the last words of the Star-Spangled Banner are "Gentlemen, start your engines".

11. You lit a match in the bathroom and your house exploded right off its wheels.

12. The Halloween pumpkin on your porch has more teeth than your spouse.

13. You have to go outside to get something from the fridge.

14. One of your kids was born on a pool table.

15. You need one more hole punched in your card to get a freebie at the House of Tattoos.

16. You can't get married to your sweetheart because there's a law against it.

17. You think loading the dishwasher means getting your wife drunk.
Last edited by BFT3K; 09-18-2010 at 07:12 AM..
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Old 09-18-2010, 07:24 AM   #2
Coup
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You might be a redneck if you live in a rural area in the southern united states of amerikkka
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Old 09-18-2010, 07:31 AM   #3
BFT3K
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Unrelated, here is a clever Japanese car commercial...



https://youtube.com/watch?v=jJ2yGIYMWwo
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Old 09-18-2010, 10:48 AM   #4
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Those are very funny
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Old 09-18-2010, 11:38 AM   #5
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As a redneck, I find those highly offensive.
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Old 09-18-2010, 12:02 PM   #6
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I guess Im not a redneck
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Old 09-18-2010, 06:48 PM   #7
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A bump for the night crew...
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Old 09-18-2010, 06:57 PM   #8
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You might be a redneck if your home is mobile and the three trucks in front of it aren't.

You might be a redneck if your porch collapses and more than three dogs die.

You might be a redneck if you believe everything you see on Fox News.
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Old 09-18-2010, 07:13 PM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by cyber_ninja View Post
I guess Im not a redneck
Funny site in your sig!

I just copied this one over...

Joe Smith started the day early having set his alarm clock (MADE IN JAPAN) for 6 a.m. While his coffee pot (MADE IN CHINA) was perking, he shaved with his electric razor (MADE IN HONG KONG). He put on a dress shirt (MADE IN SRI LANKA), designer jeans (MADE IN SINGAPORE) and tennis shoes (MADE IN KOREA).

After cooking his breakfast in his new electric skillet (MADE IN INDIA) he sat down with his calculator (MADE IN MEXICO) to see how much he could spend today. After setting his watch (MADE IN TAIWAN) to the radio (MADE IN INDIA) he got in his car (MADE IN GERMANY) and continued his search for a good paying AMERICAN JOB.

At the end of yet another discouraging and fruitless day, Joe decided to relax for a while. He put on his sandals (MADE IN BRAZIL) poured himself a glass of wine (MADE IN FRANCE) and turned on his TV (MADE IN INDONESIA), and then wondered why he can't find a good paying job in.....AMERICA.
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Old 09-18-2010, 07:18 PM   #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BFT3K View Post
Funny site in your sig!

I just copied this one over...

Joe Smith started the day early having set his alarm clock (MADE IN JAPAN) for 6 a.m. While his coffee pot (MADE IN CHINA) was perking, he shaved with his electric razor (MADE IN HONG KONG). He put on a dress shirt (MADE IN SRI LANKA), designer jeans (MADE IN SINGAPORE) and tennis shoes (MADE IN KOREA).

After cooking his breakfast in his new electric skillet (MADE IN INDIA) he sat down with his calculator (MADE IN MEXICO) to see how much he could spend today. After setting his watch (MADE IN TAIWAN) to the radio (MADE IN INDIA) he got in his car (MADE IN GERMANY) and continued his search for a good paying AMERICAN JOB.

At the end of yet another discouraging and fruitless day, Joe decided to relax for a while. He put on his sandals (MADE IN BRAZIL) poured himself a glass of wine (MADE IN FRANCE) and turned on his TV (MADE IN INDONESIA), and then wondered why he can't find a good paying job in.....AMERICA.
re-copied and passed on
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Old 09-19-2010, 07:41 AM   #11
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very funny redneck shit
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Old 09-19-2010, 07:46 AM   #12
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10. You think the last words of the Star-Spangled Banner are "Gentlemen, start your engines".
They aren't?
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Old 09-19-2010, 11:12 AM   #13
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Some were pretty funny
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Old 09-19-2010, 11:26 AM   #14
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You may be a redneck lawyer if the number 1 question in your divorce practice is:

"Hey, if we get this divorce, she's still my sister, right?"
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Old 09-19-2010, 11:27 AM   #15
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You may be a redneck lawyer if the number 1 question in your divorce practice is:

"Hey, if we get this divorce, she's still my sister, right?"
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Old 09-19-2010, 12:18 PM   #16
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Old 09-19-2010, 12:19 PM   #17
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not bad
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Old 09-19-2010, 12:24 PM   #18
cyber_ninja
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BFT3K View Post
Funny site in your sig!

I just copied this one over...

Joe Smith started the day early having set his alarm clock (MADE IN JAPAN) for 6 a.m. While his coffee pot (MADE IN CHINA) was perking, he shaved with his electric razor (MADE IN HONG KONG). He put on a dress shirt (MADE IN SRI LANKA), designer jeans (MADE IN SINGAPORE) and tennis shoes (MADE IN KOREA).

After cooking his breakfast in his new electric skillet (MADE IN INDIA) he sat down with his calculator (MADE IN MEXICO) to see how much he could spend today. After setting his watch (MADE IN TAIWAN) to the radio (MADE IN INDIA) he got in his car (MADE IN GERMANY) and continued his search for a good paying AMERICAN JOB.

At the end of yet another discouraging and fruitless day, Joe decided to relax for a while. He put on his sandals (MADE IN BRAZIL) poured himself a glass of wine (MADE IN FRANCE) and turned on his TV (MADE IN INDONESIA), and then wondered why he can't find a good paying job in.....AMERICA.
lol,thanks I took it out of My sig before I started a joke thread but its www.6jokes.com for anyone thats interestead
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