Jeff Foxworthy On The Taliban - GoFuckYourself.com

SallyRand · 09-19-2010, 10:34 AM

Nobody likes the Taliban. Nobody.

"Some interesting observations on the Taliban by that great American philosopher, Jeff Foxworthy.

"YOU MAY BE A TALIBAN IF..."

1. You refine heroin for a living, but you have a moral objection to liquor.

2. You own a $3,000 machine gun and $5,000 rocket launcher, but you can't afford shoes.

3. You have more wives than teeth.

4. You wipe your butt with your bare hand, but consider bacon "unclean."

5. You think vests come in two styles: bullet-proof and suicide.

6. You can't think of anyone you haven't declared Jihad against.

7. You consider television dangerous, but routinely carry explosives in your clothing.

8. You were amazed to discover that cell phones have uses other than setting off roadside bombs.

9. You have nothing against women and think every man should own at least four.

10. You've always had a crush on your neighbor's goat.

11. Your cousin is president of the United States."

heh, heh..............................

Sally.

2MuchMark · 09-19-2010, 11:20 AM

1-10 funny.

11 - stupid.

_Richard_ · 09-19-2010, 11:25 AM

did he call the president a terrorist and guilty of treason? i don't get it

seeandsee · 09-19-2010, 11:32 AM

thread trolled rolled

potter · 09-19-2010, 11:40 AM

Wow, that's what you find funny?

Here - these should be gold to you then: http://www.knock-knock-joke.com

madm1k3 · 09-19-2010, 11:47 AM

You might be Jeff Foxworthy if:

1. You had a good line in 1993
2. You've been annoying people with the same line since 1993

Amputate Your Head · 09-19-2010, 11:54 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SallyRand

1. You refine heroin for a living, but you have a moral objection to liquor.

this is straight up incorrect.

the Taliban were our puppets. we armed them. they kept their population in check, and we liked that. but then, they burned the poppy fields. they are violently opposed to it.

this angered the men behind the curtain, and something had to be done.

[insert that 'something' here]

now, things are back to the way they were intended. 93% of the opiates on the world market originated in Afghanistan, and now it's protected by the fiercest military on Earth.

BlackCrayon · 09-19-2010, 12:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by madm1k3

You might be Jeff Foxworthy if:

1. You had a good line in 1993
2. You've been annoying people with the same line since 1993

jeff foxworthy never actually said any of that. just another repub type email forward.

blackmonsters · 09-19-2010, 01:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SallyRand

Nobody likes the Taliban. Nobody.

"Some interesting observations on the Taliban by that great American philosopher, Jeff Foxworthy.

"YOU MAY BE A TALIBAN IF..."

1. You refine heroin for a living, but you have a moral objection to liquor.

2. You own a $3,000 machine gun and $5,000 rocket launcher, but you can't afford shoes.

3. You have more wives than teeth.

4. You wipe your butt with your bare hand, but consider bacon "unclean."

5. You think vests come in two styles: bullet-proof and suicide.

6. You can't think of anyone you haven't declared Jihad against.

7. You consider television dangerous, but routinely carry explosives in your clothing.

8. You were amazed to discover that cell phones have uses other than setting off roadside bombs.

9. You have nothing against women and think every man should own at least four.

10. You've always had a crush on your neighbor's goat.

11. Your cousin is president of the United States."

heh, heh..............................

Sally.

You might be an hopelessly ignorant American if number 11 made any sense to you.

PornMD · 09-19-2010, 01:28 PM

Jeff Foxworthy is about half as funny as diarrhea.

tony286 · 09-19-2010, 01:30 PM

Of course since the president is black he cant be one of us. So he has be with the enemy.

09-19-2010, 10:34 AM	#1
SallyRand So Fucking Banned Industry Role: Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: In A Galaxie Far, Far Away! Posts: 3,487	Jeff Foxworthy On The Taliban Nobody likes the Taliban. Nobody. "Some interesting observations on the Taliban by that great American philosopher, Jeff Foxworthy. "YOU MAY BE A TALIBAN IF..." 1. You refine heroin for a living, but you have a moral objection to liquor. 2. You own a $3,000 machine gun and $5,000 rocket launcher, but you can't afford shoes. 3. You have more wives than teeth. 4. You wipe your butt with your bare hand, but consider bacon "unclean." 5. You think vests come in two styles: bullet-proof and suicide. 6. You can't think of anyone you haven't declared Jihad against. 7. You consider television dangerous, but routinely carry explosives in your clothing. 8. You were amazed to discover that cell phones have uses other than setting off roadside bombs. 9. You have nothing against women and think every man should own at least four. 10. You've always had a crush on your neighbor's goat. 11. Your cousin is president of the United States." heh, heh.............................. Sally.

09-19-2010, 11:20 AM	#2
2MuchMark Videochat Solutions Industry Role: Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: Canada Posts: 49,802	1-10 funny. 11 - stupid. __________________ Custom Coding \| Videochat Solutions \| Age Verification \| IT Help & Support www.2Much.net

09-19-2010, 11:32 AM	#4
seeandsee Check SIG! Industry Role: Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Europe (Skype: gojkoas) Posts: 50,945	thread trolled rolled __________________ BUY MY SIG - 50$/Year Contact here

09-19-2010, 11:40 AM	#5
potter Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: Denver Posts: 6,559	Wow, that's what you find funny? Here - these should be gold to you then: http://www.knock-knock-joke.com __________________

09-19-2010, 11:47 AM	#6
madm1k3 Confirmed User Join Date: Jul 2005 Posts: 472	You might be Jeff Foxworthy if: 1. You had a good line in 1993 2. You've been annoying people with the same line since 1993 __________________ Always looking for trades on Linkspun! Check my Id here

09-19-2010, 11:25 AM	#3
_Richard_ Too lazy to set a custom title Industry Role: Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: Earth Posts: 30,990	did he call the president a terrorist and guilty of treason? i don't get it

09-19-2010, 01:28 PM	#10
PornMD Mainstream Businessman Industry Role: Join Date: Jan 2007 Location: San Diego Posts: 9,291	Jeff Foxworthy is about half as funny as diarrhea. __________________ Want to crush it in mainstream with Facebook ads? Hit me up.

09-19-2010, 01:30 PM	#11
tony286 lurker Industry Role: Join Date: Aug 2002 Location: atlanta Posts: 57,021	Of course since the president is black he cant be one of us. So he has be with the enemy.