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Old 07-28-2005, 07:28 PM   #1
SteveLightspeed
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If getting laid was like selling memberships to pornsites....

Getting listed on a big tgp = going to a club

Getting a gallery view = making eye contact

Getting a click through to the tour = talking to a hot girl

Closes the tour without a sale, pops exit console = She's not into you. Introduce her to your friends as a favor to them.

Click through to the join page = she's interested

Fills out the join form = she's partying back at your place

Sale declined by bank = she doesn't want to cheat on her boyfriend

Bank error = she forgot she was on her period

Making a trial sale = she gives you a handjob

Making a full sale = getting laid

Void = she fucks you, but won't let you cum

Sale that cancels before first rebill = one night stand

Failed Rebill = She wants you to call, but you lost her number

Rebill = you fuck her again

Refund = she tells you that you are lousy in bed

Chargeback = she tells everyone you know that you are lousy in bed
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Old 07-28-2005, 07:28 PM   #2
European Lee
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Most of GFY would be bigger losers than they are now

Regards,

Lee
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Old 07-28-2005, 07:29 PM   #3
DateDoc
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LOL, that is good!
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Old 07-28-2005, 07:29 PM   #4
Jason
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LOL.. love it
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Old 07-28-2005, 07:30 PM   #5
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Quote:
Originally Posted by European Lee
Most of GFY would be bigger losers than they are now

Regards,

Lee

aint that the truth
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Old 07-28-2005, 07:30 PM   #6
After Shock Media
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Cross sell - You get to nail her friend to.
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Old 07-28-2005, 07:31 PM   #7
Jason
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can I make a entry?

Getting a cross sale = She brings her friend.
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Old 07-28-2005, 07:31 PM   #8
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Getting listed on the wrong tgp = accidently going to a gay club
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Old 07-28-2005, 07:31 PM   #9
European Lee
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Also dont forget the upsell = You get to use the poop shute too

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Lee
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Old 07-28-2005, 07:32 PM   #10
sweetums
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What happens when Lightspeed spends too much time locked in the office....
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Old 07-28-2005, 07:32 PM   #11
European Lee
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lightspeed
Getting listed on the wrong tgp = accidently going to a gay club
Ill take the traffic instead Steve

Regards,

Lee
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Old 07-28-2005, 07:32 PM   #12
SteveLightspeed
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PornDollar
can I make a entry?

Getting a cross sale = She brings her friend.
No, thats making an upsell.

Getting a cross sale = she lets your friend fuck her too, now he owes you a 3some with his chick
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Last edited by SteveLightspeed; 07-28-2005 at 07:34 PM..
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Old 07-28-2005, 07:34 PM   #13
Jason
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Haha..
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Old 07-28-2005, 07:34 PM   #14
FTVGirls
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Another modification:

Chargeback = she dumps you, and leaves you with an STD.
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Old 07-28-2005, 07:35 PM   #15
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Nice one steve
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Old 07-28-2005, 07:35 PM   #16
WiredGuy
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hahahaha, these are awesome!
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Old 07-28-2005, 07:36 PM   #17
SteveLightspeed
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Getting your sale shaved by a sponsor = You got fucked but didn't remember it
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Old 07-28-2005, 07:42 PM   #18
SteveLightspeed
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Quote:
Originally Posted by FTVGirls
Another modification:

Chargeback = she dumps you, and leaves you with an STD.
Thats more like a server crash after the sale.
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Old 07-28-2005, 07:44 PM   #19
corvette
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real original!
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Old 07-28-2005, 07:46 PM   #20
SteveLightspeed
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wait

Surfer posts his password = you got VD
Server crash after sale = you got Gonorrea
Permanent DDOS attack = you got Herpes
Feds close you down for selling porn = you got AIDS
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Last edited by SteveLightspeed; 07-28-2005 at 07:48 PM..
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Old 07-28-2005, 07:50 PM   #21
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She hits an exit console link=She comes back to your place but leaves with your friend.
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Old 07-28-2005, 07:56 PM   #22
xknight
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That was great! A+
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Old 07-28-2005, 08:14 PM   #23
chase
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hahahaha, too fuckin funny.
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Old 07-28-2005, 08:19 PM   #24
chadglni
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You rich bastards with too much time on your hands. ;)
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Old 07-28-2005, 08:29 PM   #25
xNetworx
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Good Conversions = Don't change your game, you keep getting laid
Bad Conversions = Time for a new hairstyle and/or clothes
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Old 07-28-2005, 08:34 PM   #26
Shoehorn!
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Old 07-28-2005, 08:35 PM   #27
V_RocKs
Damn Right I Kiss Ass!
 
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That about sums it up!
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Old 07-28-2005, 08:36 PM   #28
wargames
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Classic Steve cant stop laughing
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Old 07-29-2005, 12:13 AM   #29
tristan_D
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I give my two thumbs up for that very funny post.
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Old 07-29-2005, 12:15 AM   #30
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LOL, great post
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Old 07-29-2005, 12:17 AM   #31
SteveLightspeed
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I should have said:

Rebill = you fuck her again, but she doesn't really get much out of it
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Old 07-29-2005, 12:27 AM   #32
IPK
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that's funny
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Old 07-29-2005, 12:28 AM   #33
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lightspeed
I should have said:

Rebill = you fuck her again, but she doesn't really get much out of it
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Old 07-29-2005, 12:36 AM   #34
georgeyw
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Quote:
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Void = she fucks you, but won't let you cum
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Old 07-29-2005, 12:37 AM   #35
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Man this was a funny thread
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Old 07-29-2005, 12:39 AM   #36
SteveLightspeed
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How about these:

Refund = she wants to have sex, but only if she can fuck you with a strapon
Chargeback = she's a tranny
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Old 07-29-2005, 12:41 AM   #37
2HousePlague
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Taking her to a new restaurant = adding new feeds.

2HP
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Old 07-29-2005, 12:41 AM   #38
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haha! that's some good stuff!
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Old 07-29-2005, 12:43 AM   #39
SteveLightspeed
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Cancelation discount = telling her if she stays, you'll let her cum first next time
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Old 07-29-2005, 12:45 AM   #40
SteveLightspeed
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Complimentary password = fucking an ugly chick instead of your hand
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Old 07-29-2005, 12:48 AM   #41
SteveLightspeed
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Search engine traffic = she hits on you first

Members area traffic = she hits on you first, and she's not wearing any panties
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Last edited by SteveLightspeed; 07-29-2005 at 12:50 AM..
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Old 07-29-2005, 12:52 AM   #42
SteveLightspeed
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Email traffic = you ask every woman at the bar, even the oldest and ugliest ones, to fuck
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Old 07-29-2005, 12:54 AM   #43
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Funny shit Steve Ill try and aproch my next date like this.
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Old 07-29-2005, 12:55 AM   #44
2HousePlague
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she gets carded at the bar = 2257

you take her to your friend's dump to fuck her 'cause your wife is home = .XXX


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Old 07-29-2005, 12:59 AM   #45
SteveLightspeed
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Using your own credit card to join, to test if everything is working = self explanatory
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Old 07-29-2005, 01:17 AM   #46
SteveLightspeed
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lightspeed
Using your own credit card to join, to test if everything is working = self explanatory
Ok, one more:

Chargeback = you fuck her, but her boyfriend kicks the shit out of you later
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Old 07-29-2005, 01:23 AM   #47
SteveLightspeed
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Hardcore tour = Walking around at the bar with your cock hanging out
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Old 07-29-2005, 01:27 AM   #48
SteveLightspeed
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Popup hell = you are so drunk, you keep asking the same woman over and over, and wonder why you never get laid
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Old 07-29-2005, 01:28 AM   #49
SteveLightspeed
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CCbill scrub = Ron Cadwell is there, showing off his bling bling watch
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Old 07-29-2005, 01:31 AM   #50
SteveLightspeed
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Scumware = she fucks someone who is just pretending to be you
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