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Originally Posted by Pornwolf
Not for nothing, I like both of you ladies here and have enjoyed your posts over the years.
With that said, you guys are taking this issue personally and not looking at it for what it is.When a man marries a smaller girl obviously that package is what turns him on.
We aren't talking about the man that marries the bigger girl, more power to him. Plenty of people do.
We'e not talking about women with medical conditions, pregnant women or even women that are clincally insane and lose control around Ho Ho's.
This coversation if for the other guy. For the guy that marries a small woman obviously some of the attraction dies when the woman gets large. Not that he's not going to still love her, sure on an emotional level he will, but realistically the attraction is going to go away. Cheating is not far behind.
Who wants that to happen? So, it's in the woman's best interest to do what she can to keep that from happening. It's insanely irresponsible for her not to take care of herself and keep that from happening.
Same for the man, no one's claiming a double standard here, we have to keep looking as good as possible as well... although the first priority of a responsible husband is to financially take care of the home which puts us in a different bag.
I'm in the gym at least 4 days a week. 8% bodyfat and plenty of muscle. If my girlfriend starts to gain weight uncontrollably I'm going to help her lose it. But if she gets to the point where she just lets herself go and makes no effort to stay healthy then what the fuck do you expect me to do? Same goes for marriage. At least put in the effort I do.
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This is exactly what I mean..you would be PRO-ACTIVE in such a situation.. but you my dear are an EXCEPTION, not a rule. A lot of men are quick to criticize a woman for gaining a few pounds, but they can't be bothered to help them get it back. Remember too, that once a woman reaches menopause, it is more difficult for her to keep the weight down.. this is not conjecture, it's a scientific fact, and sometimes even just the process of aging is enough to bring a woman down and get her into the cycle...
I apologize if it seems I'm taking his personally... more than anything I really think it's the world's view that's fucked up than anything. I can appreciate a man who marries a small woman who wants her to stay that way, and 99.9% of the time SHE wants to stay that way too, but life happens, and gets in the way... A spirit of helpfulness and support is the only way to ward off this kind of thing, not a spirit of condemnation and criticism.
On the flip side, how many MEN get married to women and start out all sleek and muscular, then end up 10 year later balding with beer bellies and manboobs? I find that most of the time when a WOMAN says anythign about it, she's just a "bitch". There's a huge double standard that people in society seem to have, and people like Lord Nelson, and some of the other yahoos I've seen around only contribute in a negative way to that standard...
I've always been the type of person who says if you don't like something, don't bitch about it unless you're willing to change it. The same goes for EVERYTHING in life, and for people who throw up their hands and say
"I can't help", all I have to say is, why not?