|
tell her to have an exit plan
1- have some cash on hand about 100 bucks or open and epass account for her and load the account so she will something to access.
2-tell her to make copy or have on hand.. a-bank information ( she will need to close the account and reopen- easier to disappear) b- identification stuff- passport,driver, birth certificates, ssn deeds to property , car reg .. stuff that belongs to her and is in her name. Better to copy the stuff and mail to a trustworthy person. some abusers forbid access to this type of information.
3-if you have an old cell phone.. make sure it works for 911 calls and give it to her to call for help or place a bit of money on a prepaid and program in a woman's shelter and write a girls name like dawn.. on it. (better yet.. if she has her phone)
4-pack 3 days worth of simple clothes(pants, undies, socks, t shirt and coat, and toothbrush and comb inside the pockets and place in a plastic bag, if asked.. stuff for goodwill
5-exit plan. she has to know how to leave. meaning.. if she bails she needs to know in advance where to go, who to call, and where to find her exit stuff ie aboved mention. She can call a shelter.. talk to them to let them know she is thinking of leaving but not ready, (covers the where and the who) if she calls and says she wants to leave some shelter will go with the police to extract her.. and give her a safe house... and will be able to fade away.
Some of the information give ie fight back is wrong and even more dangerous.. what bully likes to be challenged.. and most bullies dont like to be challenged and will
fight harder to maintain their power. think about it.. people in a country dont like the leader .. try a revoultion.. what does the leader do? sends in the army to fight the uprising. Abuse is about power and control.. pure and simple..
and the answer to that problem is break that control. How.. leave.
|