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my first choice would be to explain to your hosts that you would love to spend time with them, but that you are not comfortable with your ex in the room. after all, that is the truth.
failing that, show up with a bottle of wine and a hot chick hanging all over you. give them the wine, smile at the room for a few minutes, and then leave - make sure the girl you take is in on it, so she can really make it look good.
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