steffie

OMG thats too funny

Words of Wisdom
You have two choices in life:
You can stay single and be miserable,
or get married and wish you were dead.
**************************************
At a cocktail party, one woman said to another,
"Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong
finger?"
"Yes, I am. I married the wrong man."
********************************************
A lady inserted an ad in the classifieds: "Husband
Wanted"
Next day she received a hundred letters.
They all said the same thing: "You can have mine."
**********************************
When a woman steals your husband,
there is no better revenge than to let her keep him.
*******************************************
A woman is incomplete until she is married. Then she
is finished.
***********************************************
A little boy asked his father,
"Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?"
Father replied, "I don't know, son, I'm still
paying."
******************************************
Then there was a woman who said,
"I never knew what real happiness was until I got
married, and by then, it was too late."
**************************************************
Marriage is the triumph of imagination over
intelligence.
**************************************************
If you want your spouse to listen and
pay strict attention to every word you say -- talk
in your sleep.
************************************************** ****
Just think, if it wasn't for marriage, men would go
through life thinking they had no faults at all.
************************************************** ***
First guy says, "My wife's an angel!"
Second guy remarks, "You're lucky. Mine's still
alive."
************************************************** ***
A Woman's Prayer
Dear Lord, I pray for Wisdom, to understand a man,
to love and to forgive him, and for Patience, for his
moods. Because, Lord, if I pray
for Strength, I'll just beat him to death.
************************************************** **
AND NOW FOR THE FAVORITE!!!
Husband and wife are waiting at the bus stop with
their nine children.
A blind man joins them after a few minutes. When the
bus arrives, they find it overloaded and only the wife
and the nine kids are able to fit
onto the bus.
So the husband and the blind man decide to walk.
After a while, the husband gets irritated by the
ticking of the stick of the blind man as he taps it on
the sidewalk, and says to him, "Why
don't you put a piece of rubber at the end of your
stick? That ticking sound is driving me crazy."
The blind man replies, "If you would've put a rubber
at the end of YOUR stick, we'd be riding the bus ...
so shut the hell up."

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Partying since '96 and not going anywhere Anna's Dorm