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Here is the difference in my opinion:
1) There are not that many 3rd-party processors left anymore, and the banks are trying to cut that number down even further. The ones that may "scrub too hard", it's because they have no choice. They would rather stay in business than become the next IBill. This point is even moreso for the ones using US banks (of which only 2-3 remain who will process adult).
2) Merchant accounts, on the other hand, are usually less secure and in some cases much shadier. Many will allow you MUCH lower scrubbing levels, which is the reason for more sales. This doesn't come for free though; you can lose these merchant accounts any day, at any time. The risk is always present and it's a lot bigger than with 3rd party processors.
A good company will never rely on just one or the other for their processing; they will try and have as many options available as possible, both in merchant accounts and 3rd-party processors.
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