Originally Posted by fris

I shat on my keyboard today. So I was vaccuming my keyboard to remove the dried up man juice of my past expeditions into trannybooth.com. I was playing with different settings on the cleaner, and noticed how it produced keystrokes when it was blowing. It made me wonder - was my own fart strong enough to type something? Being the experimenting type, I went ahead and pulled down my pants, positioned my ass right above the keyboard and let out a thunderous one. Turned out my bowel had decieved me, for along with the gas came hot chunks of shit. My computer started beeping like crazy as a huge log pressed down on the function keys. My keyboard went friggin shit-brown. There it was, a steaming turd right across my home row. I had to use fucking motor oil to clean away the fecal matter. I don't know what I'm going to tell my sister when she finds out the keyboard smells like crap.