Originally Posted by GatorB

Your intro is too long. Does it take 10 similar "I'm not making enough money" pics and 10 "I feel more free now" pics to make a point? And they linger too long before the next one shows up. I'm not retarded and I can read "I can't make ends meet." in about 2 seconds. It just as important to KEEP a potential clients attention as it is to get it in the first place.