I feel like being social on GFY tonight. My question about who doesn't drink got me thinking.
What's the most humbling/sobering moment or memory of your life? I'm asking about humbling moments, and not embarrassing moments, unless yours is one and the same.
I have a couple, both of which are from my childhood. They've affected me in the way I live my life as an adult.
First one is as a child, I was very poor. I didn't understand it very well at the time. As I look back, I know that my mom often did without, so I could have certain things. I know that's what a parent is supposed to do, but to look back and see where she would skip a meal so I could have food is something that humbles me greatly.
Second one is when I was 6 or 7, my dad would get piss drunk and beat my mom in front of me. One night, he was beating my mom senseless in the kitchen, which I could clearly see from my bedroom. He then came into my room, asked me who I wanted to live with: him or my mom. Of course, I said my mom. He then flipped my bed over on me and went back in and beat her some more. It wasn't until I was 17 or so that I stopped blaming myself for that night. That was also the night that I helped my mom clean her blood off of the kitchen floor.
And just because I feel "talkative," things are much better now. It took my mom putting a shotgun to his head and threatening his life to make him go away, but it worked. She's never been the same because of his beatings. She's a very strong woman though. Also, last year, while my grandfather laid next to us on life support, I confronted my dad about all of this. I told him how I truly felt about him and his actions, which I could tell crushed him. I shouldn't have felt pleasure from it, but in a sick, sadistical way I did. I think it may have been because I knew what I said to him would impact him and the way he thought about things. No father wants to hear, "if I was to ever turn out anything like you, I'd kill myself."
Ok. Enough ranting. Just up and bored. Felt like getting some conversations going
