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Originally Posted by painintheass
3. Guy is good looking we hit it off... I'm a big girl.. I figure I'm going to get laid.
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Big as in 400 pounder?
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Originally Posted by painintheass
4. After dinner the guy excuses himself.. Has other things to do. (Turns out he is gay.. Imagine the odds in Paris.)
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He's not gay, it was just a nice way to say "fuck off"
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Originally Posted by painintheass
6. Thank heavens it was late at night. I crap myself on the metro.
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Sounds like you've done it before.
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Originally Posted by painintheass
7. Get home... sit on the toilet for 30 mins and have a shower. Clean up and put my dirty clothes in the laundry.
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You didnt shower first? So you smeared shit all over the toilet?
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Originally Posted by painintheass
9. Get up this morning... I ruined the new expensive white linen bed sheets I recently purchased... I got my period a week early.
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Linen is exspensive? Since when?