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I wrote this!
I hope this gives you a laugh, or at least causes you severe mental agony.
A mortician is making out his will. He says to his lawyer, "I'm leaving the hearse to my nephew, Walter. He's always nagged me about my drinking, though... I want to specify that he can't have it until he's drunk my entire wine collection."
"I'm afraid you can't do that," says the lawyer.
"Why not? It's my wine collection and my hearse!"
"You don't understand," the lawyer replies. "It's against the law to make someone consume alcohol against his will.
You can leave the hearse to Walter, but you can't make him drink."
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Sleep well, and dream of large women.
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