spacedog

No Soul_Rebel.. It was NEVER a joke. All this is real. & Smegma, I see your point, but don't assume I have done nothing. Just because I have spent 10 - 15 minutes online last night, & maybe an hour the night before that. There's only so much I can do in this situation. No car, no phone, no public transportation, no friends or family to turn to for help, & being many miles from anything or anyone. I'm trying to get out of this state & go to where there are jobs, public trans, etc.. should I just pack a small bag of clothes & just leave everything behind??
I can show up in court next monday & I pray to god that things will work out with my wife & I, & we can work together on rebuilding our life together.. I wonder how pissed off she'd be knowing I left everything behind?? Pissed off enough to not want to work things out?? What if I rent a single room & she changes her mind & says she wants to work things out.. Now instead of having a home for her & our children to come home to, I have a room.. oh yeah, that's really gonna reassure her that things will be ok. All these possibilities are cumbersome thoughts & difficult to make decisions, & the anguish, anxiety, fear, loss, etc is no peice of cake either.. I am alone & going through a very hard ordeal & have nobody & noone to talk to, so forgive me for posting on a message board to try to vent & maybe get some feedback, though I could just keep it all bottled up inside & break down completely. Scuse me for acting out of desperation Ray!!! Scuse me for being a human being with feelings. Scuse me for posting on a message board at 11:15pm because I cant sleep & have nobody to talk to, & am bored out of my skull & have all these things on my mind & I needed to do something, anything to occupy myself to prevent from going completely fucking mental.. scuse me for posting on a sunday morning!!! Scuse me for reaching out & asking for help on a message board because I have nobody else to ask for help!! Scuse me for being a confused & hurting human being.