I'm at the end of my proverbial rope here. My wife has contracted a new disorder that causes her to burst into flames at the most inappropriate times - although this usually causes her little damage, it's fucking hell on the carpet.
At this point we're living in a cave, because everything we owned was eventually incinerated, I lost my job because keeping the little woman from petting my dog took too much of my time. (Can't have the little bugger fried, can I?)
She accidently roasted the baby weeks ago, we were low on cash so dipped him in hotwing bbq sauce and made the best of it.
I'm typing this in an asbestos suit, I'm hoping all my friends at GFY will chip in and help me raise the money it will take to rebuild my charred penis and scrotum, any extra money will go to replace all my incinerated belongings with the fireproof ones, as my insurance doesn't cover fire-breathing-spouses.
Thanks in advance for your genorosity.
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