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If You Drink (Humour)
If you absolutely cannot refrain from drinking, then start a saloon in your own home. Be the only customer and you will not have to buy a liquor license.
Give your wife $20 to buy a gallon of whiskey. There are 120 shots in a gallon. Buy all your drinks from your wife at 70 cents a shot and in four days time when the gallon is gone, your wife will have $69.60 to put in the bank and $20.00 to buy another gallon.
If you live for twenty years and buy all your liquor from your wife, and then die, she will have $127,020 on deposit. Enough to bury you respectably, bring up your children to forget your name, buy a house, marry a decent man, and forget she ever knew you.
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Paul
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