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chase · 09-23-2004, 02:11 PM

We had the same problem when my step-son was put on Adderall.....we believe he has bi-polar disorder, which is commonly misdiagnosed as ADHD because the symptoms are so similar, and stimulant medication, as well as anti-depressants, make bipolar kids cycle faster. Unfortunately, no one wants to diagnose a child with bipolar disorder, since ADHD is so much more "common" and mainstream almost. So, we make due. The most important things are: consistency and routine. These kids get very emotional and stressed out when they don't know what is going on or what to expect. Make a chart with his schedule, and if he's old enough to tell time, use it consistenly to prompt him to "go see" what's next. In time, he will know what is next and will feel secure because he does know what to expect. Have him help make it, so he has a sense of control over it, and he is less likely to be angry later because he doesn't agree with the routine. (Don't allow him to run the show, but let him express himself and take it into consideration. Just make sure he understnds that you value his input, but the final decision is yours, as the parent.) Same thing with a rules/consequences chart. My step-son, Kris, is much less likely to argue about a discipline when it's the CHART that decided it, not me, and it is a chart HE helped make. Try to be as consistent as possible, with consequences and routines. Break up tasks into manageable chunks, and give him one chunk at a time, to reduce the chance that he'll get frustrated, or forget what he is doing. Try to help him stay focused by removing distractions when he is doing homework, or other important tasks. Have a conference with his teacher and explain that medication is not something you feel comfortable with, but you feel that with the two most important influences in his life working together to teach him how to function, andf prosper, despite his problems, he will be successful. Focus on his strengths, and encourage him by praising his efforts...even if he falls short of the goal, if you can see he is trying, always encourage him. Teach him that he has advantages over other "normal" kids, in that kids who have these issues are usually more creative, and energetic. Get him involved in a sport that moves quickly....baseball was a big failure with my Kris...there were too many lags and he would lose interest in the game. Once he got hit in the eye with the ball b/c he was staring into space. These kids do take more attention, time, and energy than most other kids, and there are times when you will want to stick your head in a hole for a few hours, but he's worth it...and teaching him how to be productive in spite of his issues, and possibly even use them to his advantage, will be the biggest gift you can give him in the future.
Medication can be the answer in some cases. I feel that, if you are diabetic, you take insulin, and if my child needs medication to help him have a better childhood, so be it. In our case, it wsn't possible, so we looked at other solutions. If you are not comfortable with medication, the teachers can kiss your ass...you are his parent, and they only have him for a year-you are responsible for him for much longer than that, so they need to respect your decision.
Anyway....I've dealt with some nasty things...he's kicked holes in the walls in a rage....threatened the rest of us, and lots of other little crises (WTF is the past tense of crisis? lol) so if you need an ear, feel free to hit me up.
Good luck!

09-23-2004, 02:11 PM
chase Confirmed User Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: Tampa Bay Posts: 6,019	We had the same problem when my step-son was put on Adderall.....we believe he has bi-polar disorder, which is commonly misdiagnosed as ADHD because the symptoms are so similar, and stimulant medication, as well as anti-depressants, make bipolar kids cycle faster. Unfortunately, no one wants to diagnose a child with bipolar disorder, since ADHD is so much more "common" and mainstream almost. So, we make due. The most important things are: consistency and routine. These kids get very emotional and stressed out when they don't know what is going on or what to expect. Make a chart with his schedule, and if he's old enough to tell time, use it consistenly to prompt him to "go see" what's next. In time, he will know what is next and will feel secure because he does know what to expect. Have him help make it, so he has a sense of control over it, and he is less likely to be angry later because he doesn't agree with the routine. (Don't allow him to run the show, but let him express himself and take it into consideration. Just make sure he understnds that you value his input, but the final decision is yours, as the parent.) Same thing with a rules/consequences chart. My step-son, Kris, is much less likely to argue about a discipline when it's the CHART that decided it, not me, and it is a chart HE helped make. Try to be as consistent as possible, with consequences and routines. Break up tasks into manageable chunks, and give him one chunk at a time, to reduce the chance that he'll get frustrated, or forget what he is doing. Try to help him stay focused by removing distractions when he is doing homework, or other important tasks. Have a conference with his teacher and explain that medication is not something you feel comfortable with, but you feel that with the two most important influences in his life working together to teach him how to function, andf prosper, despite his problems, he will be successful. Focus on his strengths, and encourage him by praising his efforts...even if he falls short of the goal, if you can see he is trying, always encourage him. Teach him that he has advantages over other "normal" kids, in that kids who have these issues are usually more creative, and energetic. Get him involved in a sport that moves quickly....baseball was a big failure with my Kris...there were too many lags and he would lose interest in the game. Once he got hit in the eye with the ball b/c he was staring into space. These kids do take more attention, time, and energy than most other kids, and there are times when you will want to stick your head in a hole for a few hours, but he's worth it...and teaching him how to be productive in spite of his issues, and possibly even use them to his advantage, will be the biggest gift you can give him in the future. Medication can be the answer in some cases. I feel that, if you are diabetic, you take insulin, and if my child needs medication to help him have a better childhood, so be it. In our case, it wsn't possible, so we looked at other solutions. If you are not comfortable with medication, the teachers can kiss your ass...you are his parent, and they only have him for a year-you are responsible for him for much longer than that, so they need to respect your decision. Anyway....I've dealt with some nasty things...he's kicked holes in the walls in a rage....threatened the rest of us, and lots of other little crises (WTF is the past tense of crisis? lol) so if you need an ear, feel free to hit me up. Good luck! __________________ Need Hosting? Reality Check Network services me purrrfectly!