<rant>
I Just hate it when I go to use the restroom at someone's house and they have those cushy, puffy, supposed to make your ass happy toilet seats installed. Some people even have the shag versions!
What I hate about them is that they don't hold themselves up! You can't just pop it up and let it rest in the upward position. So here I am trying to show a little respect and not piss all over their toilet seat but the fucker just won't stay up! I'm forced to hold it up with one hand and control my wraskley weasel with the other. It's like trying to pin down a cobra while your using your other hand to keep the basket open!!!
So word to all of you guilty of purchasing and installing those abhorations of plumbing...if I come to your house, I'm pissing all over your toilet seat.
</rant>