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AaronM · 01-14-2002, 09:29 PM

Last night my drunk ass neighbor keeps knocking on my door. I allow him to come in just to humor the bastard. Meanwhile his 7 year old son is home alone. The guy heads straight for my Jack Daniel's and asked if he can have a shot. When I turn to get a glass, the fuck starts chugging from my bottle. He then leaves after I tell him I need to get back to work and leaves his empty 32oz Icehouse bottle on my desk.

20 or so minutes later he shows up again. This time is has half a salmon with him that he recently caught. He offers it to me for another shot. I take him up on his offer and he pretty much polishes off the bottle and leaves again but refuses to take his empty bottle with him.

A little later he shows up again. This time he tells me that I need to come take his guns before he kills himself. He tells me somebody just took his kid but he does not say who it was. I go over, grab his rifle and shotgun and head out the door. I am halfway to my house when I look over the fence and lock eyes with a fucking Portland cop.

All of a sudden I have 6 fucking guns on me and I am being given directions by 3 different people. "Hands in the air" "put the weapon down" "Don't move" WTF??? How can I do all of this? I make one happy and the other 2 are gonna start firing and who knows what the 3 silent ones are gonna do.

They jump the fence and pat me down then I explain why I have the guns. They tell me they got a call about the suicidal fool and thought I was him. They take my name, the guns, and tell me that they will come by if they need anything else. WTF? What about an apology? What about my needs? I need a blow job and some clean shorts. Now the assholes want MY help? GFY! All they had to do was say "sorry for the mistake" or "thanks for pointing us to the right home" or how about "thanks for taking the guns so we did not have to kill him" NOTHING! Just, if we need to use you again, we will be in touch.

All this because I tried to help the stupid drunk next door. I tell you man, neighbors suck.

01-14-2002, 09:29 PM
AaronM GFY Royality ;) Industry Role: Join Date: Oct 2001 Location: ┌∩┐ ◣_◢ ┌∩┐ Posts: 46,921	Neighbors suck! Last night my drunk ass neighbor keeps knocking on my door. I allow him to come in just to humor the bastard. Meanwhile his 7 year old son is home alone. The guy heads straight for my Jack Daniel's and asked if he can have a shot. When I turn to get a glass, the fuck starts chugging from my bottle. He then leaves after I tell him I need to get back to work and leaves his empty 32oz Icehouse bottle on my desk. 20 or so minutes later he shows up again. This time is has half a salmon with him that he recently caught. He offers it to me for another shot. I take him up on his offer and he pretty much polishes off the bottle and leaves again but refuses to take his empty bottle with him. A little later he shows up again. This time he tells me that I need to come take his guns before he kills himself. He tells me somebody just took his kid but he does not say who it was. I go over, grab his rifle and shotgun and head out the door. I am halfway to my house when I look over the fence and lock eyes with a fucking Portland cop. All of a sudden I have 6 fucking guns on me and I am being given directions by 3 different people. "Hands in the air" "put the weapon down" "Don't move" WTF??? How can I do all of this? I make one happy and the other 2 are gonna start firing and who knows what the 3 silent ones are gonna do. They jump the fence and pat me down then I explain why I have the guns. They tell me they got a call about the suicidal fool and thought I was him. They take my name, the guns, and tell me that they will come by if they need anything else. WTF? What about an apology? What about my needs? I need a blow job and some clean shorts. Now the assholes want MY help? GFY! All they had to do was say "sorry for the mistake" or "thanks for pointing us to the right home" or how about "thanks for taking the guns so we did not have to kill him" NOTHING! Just, if we need to use you again, we will be in touch. All this because I tried to help the stupid drunk next door. I tell you man, neighbors suck.