There's a special place at Cozy Academy where you can ask me anything you want. I make my living helping newbies. I even write lessons on how to deal with messagboards.
Like Nbritte said, many of these pervs will gladly point you in the right direction, but we aren't going to do the work for you. Asking legitimate questions is fine, but we can't do a vulcan mind-meld and project our knowledge into your head.
This shit doesn't happen overnight.
Like I said, I help newbies for a living, but I come in here to have fun and unwind. If you have an adult webmaster-related question, you could go the the Cozy Academy Hub and ask the Professor.
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