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Castro finally dies at 112: Cuban cigars can now be imported legally but President Chelsea Clinton has banned all smoking.

Last remaining Fundamentalist Muslim Dies In The American Territory Of The Middle East (formerly known as Iran, Iraq, Syria, and Lebanon) .

George Z. Bush To Run For President In 2036.

35 Year Study: Diet And Exercise Is Key To Weight Loss.

Nursing Home: Bill Clinton Denies Allegations Of Affair With Head Matron

Texas Executes Last Remaining Citizen.

Baby Conceived Naturally

Average Height Of NBA Players Now Nine Foot Seven Inches.

New Law Requires Alll Nail Clippers And Screwdrivers To Be Registered By January 2036.

IRS Sets Lowest Tax Rate At 75 Percent.

Postal Service Raises Price Of First Class Stamp To $17.89. Mail Delivery To Wednesday Only.

White Minorities Want English Recognized As London's Third Language

Terminator 17 Smashes Box Office: Featuring Stem Cell Cloned Arnie

CIA Archives Opened: George W. Bush Was A Humanoid Robot Loosely Modeled On His Father

Britney Spears Comeback: Golden Oldies Concert

Exasperated Pope Gives Muslims The Finger

Elephants, Great White Sharks And Robins All Extinct.

McDonalds Opens In Public Schools

EBay Fees Have Reached 53% Of Purchase Price

Work On Iraq?Texas Oil Pipeline Continues Despite Setbacks.

Boy Falls Down Stairs Playing New Retinal Implant Video Game

J. K. Rowling Releases Harry Potter and the Divorce from Hell