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AnalProbe · 06-09-2004, 01:59 AM

In yet another sign of the end times, the Devil has raised gas prices to over $6 a gallon - just in time for the summer travel season. Speaking through his intermediary, Exxon/Mobile, the prince of darkness said, ?Go on - drive like there?s no tomorrow. And while you're at it, how?d you like a third SUV with 0% financing??

Lawmakers who had been pressuring the White House to tap the nation?s strategic oil reserves now admit it?s too late. "We're toast," said Barbara Boxer (D-California) on CNN's Late Edition.

But not everyone agrees. ?Satan may have us in a death grip,? said Saxby Chambliss (R-Georgia) at a fundraiser on Saturday, ?but that only strengthens our resolve against evil. Every sign of an energy crisis is really just more evidence that we're headed in the right direction."

06-09-2004, 01:59 AM
AnalProbe pain in the Ass Industry Role: Join Date: Jan 2004 Posts: 3,727	Satan raises gas prices to over $6 a gallon In yet another sign of the end times, the Devil has raised gas prices to over $6 a gallon - just in time for the summer travel season. Speaking through his intermediary, Exxon/Mobile, the prince of darkness said, ?Go on - drive like there?s no tomorrow. And while you're at it, how?d you like a third SUV with 0% financing?? Lawmakers who had been pressuring the White House to tap the nation?s strategic oil reserves now admit it?s too late. "We're toast," said Barbara Boxer (D-California) on CNN's Late Edition. But not everyone agrees. ?Satan may have us in a death grip,? said Saxby Chambliss (R-Georgia) at a fundraiser on Saturday, ?but that only strengthens our resolve against evil. Every sign of an energy crisis is really just more evidence that we're headed in the right direction."