I wonder if these thing cry if...
- You drive like a maniac
- You never wash it
- You light up and it doesn't want you to get lung cancer
- You keep skipping regular maintenance
- You compare it with a better looking specimen (Hey, check out that hot S-type!)
- It finds out it's now last-year's-model
- It discovers you are 12clicks, gay male, who watches Barney and sings along
- You just hit, and killed, a keeewwt widdo puppy
- You stopped filling it up with the cheap stuff at that mafia gas station, where they pour chemical waste into the storage tanks and it misses getting stoned
- You eat in the car and get special sauce all over the seats
- You park in the alley behind the adult bookstore and get something else all over the seats
- You never talk to it anymore, all you do is talk on your cell phone
- You put decals and bumperstickers on it which embarrass it
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