I can imagine my spam on there now.
"Hi my name is john and I have a problem. I go a week without touching myself but then I always go back to this link
www.free-porn-with-just-a-credit-card.com for some reason. I always get the free trials for all the sites there and they're just so good I can't resist! What do I do?!?!?! It's all there and all free!!! It's too tempting!!! Do I cancel my internet?!?!"