GoFuckYourself.com - Adult Webmaster Forum - View Single Post - I'm 29 and Want to Get Married and Have Kids!

Evelyn · 03-21-2004, 05:33 PM

getting married is fine....but I think it's important to spend some time (a few years at least) with the person you want to have kids with. Some people make great partners but terrible parents.

Some arn't terrible, they just have parenting views located on the conflicting end of the spectrum of yours.

Some people don't get the chance and sometimes it works out, but not as often as youd like. People getting pregnant young and married young have a harder time adjusting to not only the life change of a baby and co-habital domestics, but also struggle with the natural growth and changes that occur in a young adults life.

Becoming a foster parent for a few years with your partner/spouse can give you a chance to see how you guys adjust to the responsibilities of children. I'm not saying nor implying that this is an exact substitute for having your own children.

But it will give you a chance to test your patience, understanding, teamwork, and crisis-managment skills. You can choose to foster children between the ages of newborn up to 16. You can request all boys or all girls. The few training courses are fun and educational and many of the skills can be used later on with your own children.

You can not predict whether or not you will have a special-needs child of your own. Some people are completely blindsided by this when it happens to them and find it hard trying to cope. Many marriages end in divorce from the frustration that results in the emotional and sometimes physical inability to manage a life situation like this.

Having a foster kid with special needs ranging from born addicted to drugs/alcohol to slight learning disabilities, Slight mental retardation to insanely sexually abused, eating disorders(from being starved by the parents) to abandoment and authority issues. Dealing with these on a front-line basis in your own home can help prepare you for some of the possible variables you may (hopefully not) experience in your own family when you decide to start one.

Anyhow, this was just one suggestion to consider.
Good luck with what ever path you choose .

03-21-2004, 05:33 PM
Evelyn Confirmed User Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: Mt Olympus with a summer villa in Atlantis Posts: 584	getting married is fine....but I think it's important to spend some time (a few years at least) with the person you want to have kids with. Some people make great partners but terrible parents. Some arn't terrible, they just have parenting views located on the conflicting end of the spectrum of yours. Some people don't get the chance and sometimes it works out, but not as often as youd like. People getting pregnant young and married young have a harder time adjusting to not only the life change of a baby and co-habital domestics, but also struggle with the natural growth and changes that occur in a young adults life. Becoming a foster parent for a few years with your partner/spouse can give you a chance to see how you guys adjust to the responsibilities of children. I'm not saying nor implying that this is an exact substitute for having your own children. But it will give you a chance to test your patience, understanding, teamwork, and crisis-managment skills. You can choose to foster children between the ages of newborn up to 16. You can request all boys or all girls. The few training courses are fun and educational and many of the skills can be used later on with your own children. You can not predict whether or not you will have a special-needs child of your own. Some people are completely blindsided by this when it happens to them and find it hard trying to cope. Many marriages end in divorce from the frustration that results in the emotional and sometimes physical inability to manage a life situation like this. Having a foster kid with special needs ranging from born addicted to drugs/alcohol to slight learning disabilities, Slight mental retardation to insanely sexually abused, eating disorders(from being starved by the parents) to abandoment and authority issues. Dealing with these on a front-line basis in your own home can help prepare you for some of the possible variables you may (hopefully not) experience in your own family when you decide to start one. Anyhow, this was just one suggestion to consider. Good luck with what ever path you choose . __________________ The ability to quote is a servicable substitute for wit. -Somerset Maugham SAMPLE HOSTED GALLERIES 1 \| 2 \| 3 \| 4 \| 5 \| 6 Last edited by Evelyn; 03-21-2004 at 05:36 PM..