I know you guys don't like me 'n I can nebeh be a "real" webuhbmasteh. I dgust wish you wudd all accept me eben dough I'm alittle slow 'n I can't contriboot t' all de iportart stuff goigg on hehe.
I was an illegitimate child 'n my fadeh (BONEPRONE) usid to beat me wid sack full of lawn bowligg balls. I still lobe him dough 'n I hope he will take me back into the, uh uh uh, famy and stop abusigg me.
I became a bigshot Hollywood ackor t' winb his lobe but dat on made him resent me more. Siss den I'be been in rehab f' an abbicshun t' painkillehs. Lee me lone!
If you guys cudd talk t' him 'n tell him dat eben dough I'm slow on de uptake I'm still a good son.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
