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I set the phone down and tuck the .38 in my jacket pocket and go back outside and demand my parcel
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It strikes me that you're too young or something to realize how truly fucked up that is. If you had the wherewithal to call UPS and complain, you should have had enough thought to realize that picking up a gun to go met him was truly stupid and frightening. If you were afraid enough for your life to feel the need to have a gun, then don't go, call the police. It's situations like these, plus one messed up culture, that causes the US to have such high crime rates.
If you had shot him, you'd been convicted. Protecting your pets, while I love my cats and would feel like killing the bastard myself, is not justifiable in taking another's life. Especially since you have shown to have given this thought and wasn't spur of the moment.
It's also sad that few GFYers appear to call you out on this.