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It's not fucked up psychology, because women don't find desperation & neediness attractive qualities....and this is the vibe you are putting out if you "chase" a woman... they want the guy who has it going on and doesn't need them. Makes perfect sense really.
A girl can intuitively tell when you are desperate for them, versus not needing them. They want the guy who doesn't need them....cause he's got a life and he's happy. He has OTHER OPTIONS too.
Be aware that you can fake and pretend you don't need them, but you'll only be able to keep that fascade up for so long once you start getting sex from them etc... you have to literally not need them to be happy, then you're good to go.
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