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OP is clueless about swingers.
I was a swinger and too busy fucking the wife to worry about all the crap the OP points to. It's about couples not just your wife having fun.
My present wife and I have had many a threesome with girls, she enjoys seeing me have fun. Then having fun herself, she never felt excluded, jealous or let down. I would have loved to had threesomes with other men, I would enjoy just watching her have fun but not bi-sexual at all.
Love and sex are two very different things.
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