Quote:
Originally Posted by Devious Angel
But what I wanted to ask you, cam people, porn people and people from this industry.. is it the same for all of you?
How did you tell your families about this decision?
|
gracias for posting this topic cuz I sometimes forget that peeps on the non-performer end of things grapple with the same issues. big ups to everyone living life on their own terms
I do think there's a slight extra issue when it comes to female performers though, if only because all of a sudden we're inhabiting the work of the conceptual 'other'. it is way more loaded to be on the talent end of things
and that can be difficult to understand initially for peeps on the outside of our work.
in terms of whether to disclose, how are you with your parents in general? are you able to be open about all elements of your life with them, or do you have to pick and choose what you share to maintain sanity on all sides?
that I think should be the basis upon which you either choose to disclose or not (both are valid choices). Sometimes the most loving thing you can do is not give peeps more than they can handle. If you think in disclosing they'll flip and that it will cause damage to your relationship, don't go there.
In terms of my choice, I had a lot of experience with breaking news even before I started camming/creating clips so wasn't a big deal to me. It was:
hey mom and dad, I'm still a kid in high school but I'm moving out, here's my well-thought out plan
hey mom and dad, I'm dropping out of high school but here's why and my well-thought out plan
I did both (went to uni as a mature student when it was right for me), and they gritted their teeth and trusted and supported me through each choice even though they weren't exactly gung-ho with either at the time
the step from that to, many moons later:
hey mom and dad I'm becoming a cam girl wasn't much of a stretch, or an issue in any way.
I told my mom far before my dad though, wanted to make sure I was committed to the work before laying that on him.
He's proud of me too though. To this day he (wisely) won't visit my sites as my tits are all over them, but we've talked biz strategy and I know he respects my off cam work and the women I work with (which is his round about way of letting me know he's proud of that side of my work too)
key thing there: well thought out plan. you can't drop a bomb without follow-up =)
If you feel you parents would be open to learning about that side of your life, go for it, relaxed and confident and be prepared to answer questions.
This will be new to them and their primary concern will be your mental and physical security. Be real about why you do the work and why it fits your life. Not to prove anything but just to share, so they can know as they wrap their heads around it why this work works for you. Really all they want is to know that we're safe and happy and financially protected.
Wish you luck if you go there, if so let us know how it turns out