the teacher is smarter than the student and expected to be able to not get entangled into a power struggle with someone who is not as smart.
Teacher can use strategies to avoid power struggles in the classroom | Virginia Commonwealth University Training and Technical Assistance Center Newsletter
Teachers who recognize that they are feeling drawn into a battle with a student have a responsibility to take steps to end the power struggle. The following is a list of strategies and considerations that may help when tensions begin to rise (Fecser & Long, 2000; Russell, 2010; Schindler, 2002; Shahbazian et al., 2005; Walker, 1995; Wright, 2000).
Misbehavior or Mother Nature? ? Is the behavior developmentally normal for this student? If so, going head-to-head with a child for simply being a child will almost always cause conflict. For example, adolescents are likely to challenge authority and assert independence frequently. Getting angry about it will not solve the problem, but fair and consistent rules and consequences, delivered in a neutral tone, will help to shape behavior in the future.
Later! ? Choosing to walk away from a heated exchange allows both parties to cool down so that they can have a more reasonable conversation at a later time. Teachers can effectively redirect a student during a power struggle by restating an expectation and leaving the student to make a choice. After the fact, the teacher and student can discuss what happened and try to understand what was behind the behavior so that the teacher can better support the student in the future.
The last word can be lethal. ? Trying to get the last word can be a recipe for disaster. As the teacher is shouting a comment to the student on his way out the door, there is nothing to stop the student from ?topping? the teacher?s last comment. We can only be sure of our own behavior and responses, so gambling on how a student may respond to a parting comment is risky. His last word may be more than the teacher is prepared to handle. There is no benefit to upping the ante in a power struggle.
Is anybody listening to me? ? Teachers may feel the need to raise their voices during a power struggle to dominate the conversation. Raising your voice is nothing but an invitation for the student to do the same. A better approach is to speak to the student privately, out of the room if at all possible. The power struggle is less likely to escalate if it becomes a quiet and private conversation between adult and child.
Sarcasm isn?t funny. ? Often students do not understand the subtleties of sarcasm, either because it is developmentally beyond them or the comment sounds more like an insult than a ?joke.? Teachers can avoid creating stressful situations by eliminating sarcasm from their language while in school. The misunderstanding can start or inflame a power struggle with a student.
Save face. ? Ultimately, this is the goal of both the student and the teacher in a power struggle. The best way to save face is to get out of the power struggle. The rest of the class is observing the exchange and sees what pushes the teacher?s buttons and recognizes the out-of-control behavior. In the long run, this can be damaging to the teacher?s credibility with the class.
Don?t sweat the small stuff. ? The scenario in Ms. Wright?s room is a good example of how getting overly involved in a relatively minor refusal can snowball into a much larger issue. Before making demands of students, teachers should ask themselves if it really matters that the student is standing behind his desk instead of sitting in his chair, or if he starts on the last part of the assignment first. If it won?t change the instructional outcome, there is probably not a good reason to insist on compliance.
Set limits but avoid ultimatums. ? There is a difference between telling a student, ?I expect you to get started with your assignment,? and ?You need to start your work right this minute or you will lose recess for the rest of the month!? The first allows the student to make the choice but the second sets up a direct challenge. If the child still refuses, is this a threat that most teachers are willing to follow through on? What would the consequences be for not following through? This is really a no-win situation.
Take charge of yourself. ? As stated earlier, most teachers continue power struggles because the student?s behavior has struck an emotional chord. If you realize that you are feeling angry at a student, take steps to calm down before continuing the dialogue. Managing your own emotions will help you approach each student in an impartial and supportive manner.