Is there a woman you would marry? Should money come first?
Well, I don't get into relationships anymore. Women give me blowjobs and food now and that is about it. I might watch movies or have coffee with some women. But I am on some real fuck a bitch shit ever since these last two I had, not bitter or hateful, just don't have a heart beating for nobody but ME at all and it feels great.
But then there is this one woman from years ago. Downest baddest bitch ever to exist and she is the realest most talented and intelligent and accomplished and well built and amazing woman ever,
I would marry her, I would impregnate her, etc.
The thing is, a few years ago I stopped talking to her when she made what (to me) was a bad career choice and because she has a big dog I cannot stand.
Well, then, about a year after that I tried to talk with her a couple of times and she would not talk much, so I just dropped it
It's not like I am "in love" with this bitch but I could very easily be and I would love to be.. I have only been close with and "loved" four women in all of my life out of all of the women I have kept company with, get me, it is a BIG deal to me.
That is a BIG problem since no one is loyal or dedicated AT ALL and betrayal by a loved one really gets me. I have thick skin but when close *****z betray me it cuts me deep like a slicer in my spleen and kills me.
So my new ways in terms of living for ME and not getting close to people and NOT being everyone's go to guy for problem solving anymore, it is working great. I have never been so positive and so cynical all at once. It is great
What would you do? Would you go and find her and take her as your wife even though she has a demanding career and is very busy and has a big horrible dog? Would you stay up on your fuck a bitch shit and be a lone wolf? What?
If it matters, this woman is built better than you can imagine. I know some of you have seen 1000s of naked women. Some of you shoot top tier bitches. This is the type of flesh even you could not imagine.
I don't know. I am getting old. Flesh gets less important every year. I kind of welcome that in a way. Letting sex or money rule your life is dangerous- and I have done both. I have had a lot of both in my lifetime. I am MUCH more inclined to leaning toward letting money rule my life again, now. I think that may be a good thing.
When I made a lot of money and my life was empty, everything was fine. I was empty. But everything was okay. I didn't have to be scared or frustrated and I never had to go without and I never had to get hurt. double edged thing, sort of
gfy is a great place to ramble and vent
thanks
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